THE CEO

Being the CEO, the Chief Executive Officer, is a title that many business people aspire to achieve.  It represents the pinnacle of success, where YOU are the one calling the shots.  You have absolute POWER.  You set the direction, you determine the strategy.  You motivate.  You inspire.  It's The Kwon: love, respect, community and the dollars, too!

We imagine that being the CEO is the easiest job in the world.  In complete control, everyone does whatever we ask, and would do anything to get our approval and recognition.  The CEO flies in a private jet, dines in Michelin-starred restaurants, wears $10,000 suits and drinks Cristal like Perrier.  The CEO has "big conversations" on the golf course with other CEOs at the "Successful People Country Club" where everyone nods approval at every lifestyle choice.

Well, there's some good news and some bad news.

First, the bad news.  Being CEO is probably the toughest job there is.  The CEO is the public face of the company.  The one to blame for every wrongdoing.  Rather than being in absolute control, the CEO is beholden to the board of directors, who (should), in relentless pursuit of goals that magnify shareholder value and returns, drive the CEO to seek greater and greater achievement for the company.  The CEO is under the microscope constantly, his/her every move is scrutinized by the board, the employees, their peers/competitors, their customers and the media.  For listed companies, the brutal truth is reflected daily in the swings of their stock price (or their cost of borrowing/issuing bonds) and is seen and analyzed by millions.  Sure, there can be a lot of money involved, but many companies also explicitly or implicitly require the CEO to tie his/her personal fortune to the company's success - meaning failure can lead to financial as well as reputational ruin.

Most people experience a majority of their stress from their job.  In the case of the CEO, this is magnified to almost intolerable levels.  It's certainly a 24/7/365 commitment that is not to be undertaken lightly.  Most of us are afraid of the big risk of (public) failure that comes with being a CEO.  We think we could do better (maybe we could) but we are afraid to try.  In the end, most of us end our careers without ever knowing the answer.

CEOs are reliant on strong management teams that help refine and execute the strategy, since delivery is the key to results.  Good CEOs are careful not to just pick "Yes Men" but to surround themselves with ethical, critical thinkers that can add value to the vision, help identify strategic opportunity, and embody the corporate culture.  In business, like attracts like, and CEOs often develop management teams that embody both the best and worst of their own dynamic personalities.  Good CEOs have some important attributes.  Here's a simple list... Here's another.

The Good News.  We ARE the CEO of our own life (and we can never be fired!).

As CEO, like the picture shows, we have authority to make key decisions.  We also have the authority to hire, fire and promote our personal "management team" which are the cast that support us in realizing our visions and goals.  In context, it means that we have the authority, nay the RESPONSIBILITY, to surround ourselves with positive people that encourage our growth and achievement rather than negative people who constantly bring us down and limit our progress.  We can and must shuffle as needed to create and maintain the best mix of people in our circles.  When we treat those around us poorly, we can expect them to "quit" or at least to stop being invested in our success.

Like attracts like, so as good CEOs, we must keep ourselves energized and hold ourselves to the highest ethical standards so we can attract others who will do the same.  We must remain fully invested in our own outcomes, which forces us to take responsibility for refining our vision and executing against it.  CEOs are stewards of their corporate culture, and likewise we are stewards of our personal "brand" and what that will mean to those around us.  This underscores why integrity is so important for success.  Good CEOs are both mentors to others and are mentored by others, always open and willing to learn and get advice from anyone who can give productive insight.

In my case, I have been very fortunate to have a team of instructors with tremendous caliber personally and professionally.  In addition to being excellent martial artists and instructors, they are extraordinary people.  Each one has faced and overcome many challenges to drive their lives forward.  They motivate and inspire me, and are never afraid to call me out when I make mistakes.  We could never have the elite community in KM Japan that we have without their support.  I am blessed and filled with gratitude.  I'm lucky, and so are our KM Japan students.

I like the idea of running my life like a CEO.  It forces me to have a mission statement, a brand and a strategy.  It forces me to think about my values and beliefs and to make deliberate plans to execute and deliver on my life objectives.  It helps me remember to seek out contributors and service my ecosystem - the many people who are in my extended network and who care about me.  It keeps me focused on my customers --- MY STUDENTS and how to do the best for them every day.

I encourage you to become the CEO of your own life - it will be the best "job" you ever have!

Secret Techniques

There are LOTS of "secret techniques" in martial arts.  Stretching from dim mak in Chinese traditions to secret Ninjutsu to secret footwork of Wing Chun and sword drawing of Yagyu Shinkage and so on, and so on.  Everyone, it seems, is looking for a shortcut, surefire way to victory.  Saturday morning chop-socky Kung Fu movies almost all included some secret technique the master would show the student "when he was ready".  So much so that Tarantino even included it in his homage movies Kill Bill 1 & 2 as "The Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique". 

First of all, the fact that all of these so-called "secret" techniques were found using Google (no secret) in seconds, I guess they are a little too accessible to be secret.  That being said, there is value in considering the idea of a shortcut, surefire way to victory.

At its simplest, we could define military strategy as "kill more of them first" and for thousands of years that seemed to be the case.  New technology enabled us to kill others at a much faster pace and attrition was the principle way to win battles and, ultimately, wars.  This is exemplified by the Battle of the Somme in WWI, where withering machine gun fire raked No Man's Land, mowing down wave after wave of ineffective infantry charges.  Of course, the use of atomic bombs on Japan shows the zenith, at least for now, of man's use of technology to kill other men.

Modern warfare is different, however.  The goals are no longer to kill as many enemy troops as possible.  Instead, we disrupt infrastructure/communications.  We destroy the enemy's economic outputs.  We deny them access to war supplies.  We weaken their public support and will to fight.  All of these so-called "non-military" actions support, enhance and facilitate actual combat, sometimes making it almost unnecessary.  The British conflict in the Falkland Islands or the US involvement in Panama are only two examples.

In martial arts, too, there are varying degrees of fighting strategy.  Very simply, my objective can be to punch or kick my opponent into unconsciousness, as is the goal of boxing, Muay Thai and other pugilistic arts.  in Judo or Jiu Jitsu, my goal is submission or making the opponent give up for fear of joint injury or being choked/strangled unconscious.  MMA combines striking and grappling to allow more ways to render your opponent unable to continue.

Some styles emphasize specific targeting like low kicking, in an effort to win by taking away the opponent's mobility - if they can't stand they can't fight.  Still others like Kyusho Jitsu try to target acupuncture points to disrupt or "short circuit" the body's electrical system (Dim Mak is also related to this).

As we become more mature in our study, we often look to efficiency in our expression of martial arts.  This can mean a single movement that attacks on multiple dimensions or sets up multiple follow-ups.  It can also mean the use of space, timing, distance and environment to give advantage.  Furthermore, it can mean using the structure and limitations of the opponent's body to weaken their ability to resist.  In this way, we aren't attacking the person as much as we are attacking their posture, balance and structure.  Having done so, they become easier to control.  High level Aikido is known for this, as are some more esoteric Chinese traditions.

Ethically and morally (and legally) speaking, I am opposed to causing injuring to people unless there is simply no alternative.  I have no issue using pain compliance, and of course pain and injury are related but not the same.

Like many things in life, it is very important to know your objective before you determine the various options available to achieve it.  In martial arts this requires some soul-searching to realize what kind of person we are and how to express that through our art.  Self-defense should be a goal of any practical martial arts system, but excessive force is ego, and that is worth reflection, too.

I suppose the secret is really that there are no secrets.

Vietnam

George "Tim" Akins was one of the greatest men I ever knew.  He was my foster brother, older than me by 20 years.  Tim was the only son of my foster mother, Dorothy Leonard, and he grew up in Villa Park, IL. just like I did.  He went to my high school, Willowbrook HS, 20 years before I did.  By the time I came onto the scene he was already back from Vietnam and married, living first in Maywood and later in West Chicago.

Tim was a true Renaissance Man.  Self taught on a broad array of instruments including guitar, banjo, and harmonica, he played football in high school and was an Eagle scout, the highest possible rank.  He trained as a mechanical engineer and architect, even starting his own computer consulting business in the early 80s before ultimately becoming business manager of District 303 public schools in St Charles.  Tim wasn't drafted.  He volunteered and served with honor in the USMC as a radio operator, enduring many hardships in Vietnam including rocket attacks and nearly being overrun at Da Nang during the Tet Offensive in 1968.  He even took liberty in Tokyo, where I would later live most of my life.  We both got a kick out of that.  Beyond just being a warrior, Tim was a kind and gentle man.  He was a loving husband and father, and the best big brother anyone could ever hope for.  He knew everything I wish I knew.

When my foster dad retired and took my foster mom away from Chicago to live in the milder climate of Reno, NV, she tasked Tim to look after me, which he did with great care and concern.  He always had a place for me at his table and good advice from his vast knowledge and life experience.  He was the father I always wished I could have had.  I could listen to him for hours and I learned something whenever he spoke.

After I graduated from college in 1992, I lived on his screened back porch for a summer, spending my days lost among the many books in his vast collection and enjoying long, cool evenings listening to him play his folk guitar and harmonica.  In January 1993 I was back in Japan, this time for good.  After my oldest son, George, was born (and named after him), he used to say "The Georges" in our family were all "destined for greatness" and list up all the many things he was planning to teach his nephew once he retired and moved further west to a farm he was planning to buy.  It never happened.

One day in 2007 as he shaved and got ready for work he had a massive stroke, followed by several heart attacks that were finally more than he could bear.  He never woke up.  By the time I got to Chicago he was already gone.  He died far too young at only 61 years old.  Several hundred people attended his funeral from the school district, VFW, bowling league, folk music club and so on,  a testament to his far-reaching positive impact in so many peoples' lives.  He is buried near his home in West Chicago.  I was devastated.  I still am.

Tim used to say sometimes, "what are they gonna do, send me back to Vietnam?" meaning that the worst that could ever happen would have been trivial compared to what he had to go through in war as a marine.  It was many years before he was public about his service, ultimately marching in VFW parades and for POW MIA support with other veterans.  I hope he finally found peace and forgave our country for not honoring him the way they had our relatives who fought in WW2 and in Korea.  He deserved better but never complained.

Day by day we all face our challenges.  We struggle at work and school, we worry about our relationships and our bank accounts.  It's a seemingly never-ending battle to get ahead in this tough world.  Tim's words always ring true for me.  I think about the hardest challenges I've ever faced - trying for 10 years to get to Japan; working full-time while going to college full-time trying to get my education; setting up my life in a new country with a new language and culture; my wife's battle with cancer; losing my foster parents.  Truth be told, nothing could ever hurt worse than losing Tim, my guiding light.

It's been 12 years since you left, but I hope you will never stop being my guardian angel.  I miss you Big Brother.

Journeys

This is an excerpt from Adam Driver's TED Talk called "My Journey from Marine to Actor" (full video here).  I was hypnotized by how articulate, engaging and thoughtful he is.  Nearly all of my family (foster and biological) served in the military including my birth father (USMC), foster father (USAAF), foster brother (Army), foster brother (USMC) and so on and so on.  Many of my close friends from high school served as well, and I regret not having been able to join them.

I am probably the first male member of my family since the US Civil war to not serve our country.  That said, much of what Mr. Driver said resonates with me deeply.

Like Mr. Driver, I grew up in the Midwest and struggled hard to find my purpose.  I failed many times along the way until my dreams began to come true.  His were at Julliard, mine were in Japan.  Likewise, we both discovered ways of disciplining our lives via belief systems anchored both in tradition and practicality.  His via the USMC and mine via martial arts training.

He mentions the importance of learning to articulate and express his feelings through training in acting school at Julliard.  In my case, although I also acted in public theater as a child, I later joined ToastMasters and became a public speaker for many of the same reasons.  This has helped me cope with the many strong emotions in me as a foster child and paved the way for me to forgive others (and myself) for my childhood traumas.  Learning to talk it out is very, very important for mental health.

In the end, our journeys naturally lead us to discover ways of giving back, as part of the gratitude we have for all we have received.  Mr. Driver has been very active in promoting artistic expression for service members and their families.  In my own small way, my teaching is a way of "paying it forward" for a lifetime of support the martial arts and its community have given me.  I am sure we share the same feelings of pride and joy when our efforts open up new perspectives for others and give them new tools to better themselves.

Huge Respect for you, Adam Driver.  You are welcome at my house for dinner anytime.  #teamkylo