Under Pressure

 

(Thanks for the inspiration Guro Paolo)

I showed up on Day 2 of the Tokyo seminar with Guro Paolo Rubio not quite knowing what to expect. Usually I like to attend both days to ensure I have the full context and can perform at my best, but it wasn't possible this time. Still, one day is far better than no days, right? I've been watching his videos from Funker Tactical for more than 10 years, and they have consistently delivered leading edge (pun intended) information about practical applications of Kali.  

It was one of the best seminars I have attended. Guro Paolo not only knows his material fully and confidently, he is aware of the value he can bring from his teaching approach. He understands the attendees and what we need, and is laser-focused on delivering exactly that. The material is drawn largely from the PTK playbook, which means it is well-researched. What differs is Guro Paolo's presentation. As he stated "My job is not to know more than all of you. I cannot be the source of ultimate knowledge. What I can do is be an architect of great training environments." He is. This really resonated with me.

Rather than simply being focused on presenting information or variations of techniques and applications, there is a lot of value in crafting good training environments - situations where the techniques can be tested, explored, implemented and mastered. This bridges the gap from rote memorization to application, which is critical to mastery. Guro Paolo has studied and researched this topic in great depth, and it shows.

All too often, we focus on the techniques themselves, the drills and repetition. These are certainly good and important, but equally important is to balance this with scenario-based pressure testing. Yes, sparring is one method of achieving this, but it is not the only method (and sparring has limitations too). Guro Paolo's seminar was rich with problem-solving opportunities. He provided guidelines and "rules" to focus our solutioning, and allowed us to discover and explore. This requires maturity (no ego) on the part of the problem-solvers, but is a great way to uncover interesting situations and deepen understanding. We had a lot of fun and repeatedly found good solutions to good problems. 

Having  spent decades in aikido, one common criticism is that it doesn't work on an unwilling opponent. I've addressed this in other posts, but I believe this is not due to the fundamental techniques themselves but rather to the method in which they are taught and trained. Having been to war, O-Sensei (Ueshiba Morihei) was far more interested in a safe, spiritual practice that promoted peace/harmony and longevity than he was in presenting a devastating combat art. This does not mean that aikido techniques cannot be efficient and effective. It does mean that when the training goal is connecting with the partner and avoiding injury, those techniques will not be framed with the intention of life and death survival. The context is wrong.

Another example is Tai Chi's use of the long sword and other weapons, where the flowing, hypnotic movement looks detached from any practical application apart from health. There are very practical applications of Tai Chi for fighting, including weapons work, that are at least on par with other combat arts. However, these are rarely trained in that context. 

Aikido principles still lie at the heart of a lot of elite LEO and operator combat training and I have been teaching them in an effective manner for more than a decade. 

Guro Paolo emphasized the importance of pressure testing the sequences and movements. Famous in FMA are groups like the Dog Brothers, who have focused on "higher consciousness through harder impact", which sits at the extreme end of pressure testing. This is not for everyone, but the point is clear. In order to be confident that the techniques are valid and we can apply them with success, we need to approximate real-world situations as much as we can (safely) do.

Pressuring ourselves is important not only to prove the effectiveness of our martial arts responses, but also to develop our ability to manage stress and perform when situations are critical. When we keep the pressure and intensity but reduce the speed and power, we create environments where problem-solving and discovery can be developed in depth.

A full-day was not enough to fully grasp everything that Guro Paolo had to show. I am excited to see him again next year and challenge myself on his level 1 instructor track. It's a great way to add additional dimensions to how we train in KM and continue to provide the best training for our students.

Salamat Po for the great training, Guro Paolo. See you next year (or before)! 

The Great Debate

 

He and I been friends a long time. In fact, he was one of the first who believed in me. We've shared countless meals, drinks and chats about many different topics over the years. We've traveled together many times and enjoyed our time together (and still do). Last night, however, we disagreed.

Not a mild disagreement, rather a fundamental disagreement about how society should function and how we should function as part of it. Both of us were passionate about our positions. Both of us were adamant. We tried, in vain, to persuade each other to accept our arguments. We tried to show why we were "right". In the end, our opinions were not changed. If anything, they were galvanized. That's OK.

What was really important was that we could disagree; deeply disagree. Passionately disagree. Yet still remain friends. We understood each other's positions. We accepted the logic, even though neither of us was swayed by the other. Through the argument we each gained a deeper insight into the other's perspective and came away with a newfound respect. At the end of the night, we hugged each other like we always do with no bitterness or hostility. Nothing but love.

There was no need to resort to personal attacks or character assassination. There was no need for shouting or threatening or insulting. Our disagreement did not damage our friendship or result in anger. We simply have opposing views on a topic of grave importance to us both. That's OK.

My country was founded on a two-party system designed to promote exactly the kind of dialog we had. It was deliberately structured so that both parties could have opposing views and through debate decide what outcome would be the most acceptable (or least unacceptable) to both sides. This method forces compromise and cooperation, as well as helping make sure both sides always get at least part of what they wanted.

It's very disappointing that these days we cannot disagree without it descending into visceral hatred and  potential violence. We are all stuck in our microtribalism and living in echo chambers where we never really get an opportunity to safely challenge each other and discuss the important issues of our time in a respectful way. We actively avoid anyone who doesn't share the exact same beliefs we do. We seek to reinforce our confirmation bias at every opportunity, afraid of ever being wrong or, God forbid, persuaded to change our minds.  This is not healthy for us nor for society writ large.

Sadly, our leaders model the worst possible behavior and spread lies and personal attacks rather than accurate information and persuasive logic. It is increasingly difficult to find quality news and information and every day it is more challenging to find the truth hidden in all the misinformation. We are disillusioned and mistrustful of everything that doesn't align with our personal worldview.

I yearn for a simpler time when we could actively debate our way forward. I wish we could get rid of all the poisonous rhetoric and focus on the facts in order to decide the path that brings the most benefit to the majority of Americans (not just the billionaires). I wish I could trust again.

I'm grateful for having the kinds of friends, true friends, that I can disagree with. It's a blessing.

Smashing It

 

(Thanks for the inspiration David)

This weekend we met David and his lovely daughter. David is a junior high school teacher, which means he has nearly infinite patience given that he needs to navigate early-stage teenagers through one of the most challenging periods of their lives. He is a direct, no-nonsense guy, and it turns out I had some things to learn from him, too.

One of David's favorite phases is "smash it". Over the course of the weekend, we "smashed" snowboarding runs (Naeba), "smashed" our breakfasts, and even "smashed" some of the party games he had prepared to entertain us on Saturday night. I came to love that phrase and have been thinking about it all weekend.

These days we are inundated with data and information to an overwhelming degree. People can't stop looking at their phones, at Youtube/TikTok/Instagram/Facebook/Snapchat. We have so much news and content coming at us it's becoming harder and harder to determine what is true, what is real (not AI-generated), what to focus on or prioritize, and even when to act. We often feel like if we wait just a little longer, we might get new/better information to make better decisions. We get stuck in "analysis paralysis" and end up doing nothing at all. I asked David about his phrase and he explained that, having grown up on a farm, there were always chores to be done no matter the day of the week or the weather. They simply had to be done every day. These were not deep-thought experiments. They were tasks that had both vital importance to the farm operation and were shared across the family members. Standing around was not going to help. In such cases, David advised, the best approach was to just smash it out ("get it done"). I was reminded that it is critically important to live with a sense of urgency; a bias to action. This mindset helps us prioritize and then just get moving, get busy so we can get things done.

I thought of a passage in Yamamoto Tsunetomo's famous book "Hagakure" (Hidden leaves) , which was his treatise on Bushido for young samurai. He wrote "The Way of the samurai is one of immediacy. It is best to dash in headlong." This does not condone foolhardiness, rather it is rewarding the notion that when we know what must be done we must not hesitate. This is also referred to as "Right Action in the Right Moment" and is an aspirational outcome of good zen practice.

In fighting particularly, it is important to learn how to recognize danger and, when we do, to act boldly without hesitation until the matter is resolved rather than waiting for a situation to escalate out of control. This decisiveness gives us the best chance of minimizing risk and injury, not only to ourselves, but to others (including our attacker(s)). Decisiveness is not to be underestimated.

There is a time for long and deliberate reflection, of course. However, in general we would all do well to have a constant sense of urgency about living our lives, and to do so with decisiveness and immediacy.

Thank you for the lesson, David-Sensei!

Let's Smash it at training!

Eyes that See

 

Some martial arts classes are nothing but constant motion - long repetition of the same techniques over and over again. Almost no talking, no explanation. Drills and Kata are done by observing the instructor and mimicking his/her movements while the instructor drifts around the class correcting everything. This was my original dojo in suburban Chicago. It was many traditional dojos I have trained at across aikido and kenjutsu particularly. However, in my original dojo, for every hour I spent on the mat I had at least another hour of self-study “homework”. Sometimes books to read or VHS (in those days), sometimes meditations to do, sometimes lectures or discussions. I kept detailed notes and we always brought a notebook and pen to training. Always.

My teacher required us to be versed in history and philosophy of warfare/combat and to read and study constantly (in addition to my schoolwork). Often he would host discussions and once I became Deshi (disciple) it was constant. Every car ride or meal would have these dialogs and I knew to come prepared. This has formed the foundation of my approach to studying martial arts since then.

If you've been to one of my classes you quickly realize I have my own way of teaching that is a bit different from other dojos. We cover at least three subsystems in each session, but we have almost two hours of class time so I don't feel hard-pressed to rush through thousands of reps. Instead, I try to give background and context for the techniques, frameworks, patterns or drills we do rather than just do them mindlessly. To me, it's very important to emphasize the WHY of what we do.

Like any skill, at the beginning martial arts is awkward and requires our body to learn entirely new ways of moving. We struggle with even basic movements and battle our own frustration. Watching our instructors seemingly effortlessly demonstrate each technique doesn't really make us feel any better, and we often forget that they went through the same process themselves once, eventually practicing the techniques enough to become proficient. In this stage of learning, rote memorization, muscle memory to be exact, is the usual goal. We are laying the foundation and building the scaffolding for a future in martial arts. In music, this would be the equivalent of just playing the scales and chords over and over. It's important for our fingers to move seamlessly on the fret or keyboard. At the same time, this is why so many people (including me) quit music practice. Good music study is far more than just putting your fingers on the instrument. That is just one component.

I emphasize the why because I want to prepare students from day one for a future that will allow them to go beyond the drills I teach them. I want them to understand how the human body works, its strong and weak points. I want them to learn how to use their own bodies correctly to generate power and control distance. I want them to understand timing and cadence, and to truly appreciate the importance of strategy and tactics in fighting. In the end, I want them to look at all martial arts with the eyes of a professional - someone who understands at a glance what is going on. I want them to become self-learners, able to absorb content, ideas and inspiration effectively from any sources available. In music, these are those musicians who can improvise and pay by ear, who can read music but also write music - musicians with their own voice and playing style - comfortable across genres and instruments.

These are students who will one day be excellent instructors, with the depth of knowledge and understanding to prepare future generations to carry on our legacy - that of Punong Guro Fred Evrard, Guro Lila, Guro Ben and the rest of our legendary instructors. As Sigung Bruce said "the highest technique is to have no technique". Of course this is not possible at the beginning, but it is a worthy goal to move beyond drills or patterns into pure movement and expression. FLOW, after all, is the goal.

Achieving this worthy goal requires far more than just rote muscle memory. It requires a bit of academic study, a bit of theory, a bit of culture and a bit of philosophy as well as 10,000 hours on the mats themselves. I am grateful that PG Fred instilled these in all of us. His deep, lifelong study is reflected in the many excellent books he wrote, as well as the many hours in class and at camps which he shared with all of us. We were always free to ask questions, and free to discover answers on our own, too. Most of us spent a lot of time outside of class training, but also reading, watching, attending seminars and documenting our journeys. These were all important to develop our eyes. This is how we learned to truly see the journey and to better appreciate it.

So no, I don't teach a "Kali-cize" class. If people want that there are many other dojos or studios for it. What I do teach is the distillation of 45 years of martial arts study (18 of those in Kali Majapahit) and training with some of the world's greatest martial arts instructors. I am still constantly learning new material and studying/researching to deepen my own understanding. My goal in every class is to provide full access to my knowledge and experience, in the hopes that it makes each student's journey richer and their understanding more complete. I hope they will come to love Kali and the martial arts as much as I do and enjoy a lifetime of discovery as I have done.

See you at class

      

Fighting Back

 

Like many people, I started in martial arts because I wanted to fight. Not fight per se, Fight Back. I had been bullied mercilessly for almost ten years in public school. Nearly every day I was assaulted, physically or emotionally. I had to have constant supervision by the school staff for my protection. I had to stay within sight of teachers during lunch and recess and was escorted to my classrooms by faculty to make sure I wouldn't get attacked in between lessons. I was sent home from school early so that the bullies could not catch me before I got home. Somehow, they still found a way. I wanted revenge more than anything. That's what I thought at the time, anyway.

Over several years, and with good instruction, I learned that I wasn't in martial arts to fight others so much as I was learning to fight myself - learning to combat my weakness, my laziness, my doubts and fears so that ultimately I would be immune to bullying. I would become strong enough to push past obstacles and confident enough to live my life my way regardless of anyone else. This took a long time, but it laid the foundation for everything I have become and achieved throughout my life. I truly believe that without martial arts training I would have failed as a person. The training has saved my life again and again, mostly from myself rather than from others. This is why I am dedicated to sharing this gift as an instructor, in the hopes that other lives can be saved, too.

Along the way I also learned that most fights are not in the streets or back alleys. Most fights are the fights we have every day to remain true to our beliefs and to resist the messages of media and propaganda that would pull us away from our center. The news is depressing and hopeless, hammering us with negativity and rage baiting us into hating one another. Social media pressures us to try to achieve unrealistic lifestyles at the cost of our physical and mental health. We are made to believe we are incomplete and lacking in everything we are told we should want; told repeatedly that "more is better" and that we are not enough. We are forced to have "hustle" in order to make other people wealthier while we suffer from burnout and depression. We define ourselves by our LinkedIn profile and our job title. Meanwhile we feel empty inside.

In the end, the simplicity of being happy feels unachievable. We start to accept that the world is in entropy and ending right before our eyes, and that we are powerless to save it. We are broken again and again. Mostly we are heartbroken over the never ending feelings of loss that engulf us. We are bewildered by the feeling that something fundamental is missing from our lives.

Martial arts training can help. Through our time in the dojo we can remove distractions. One step at a time, one class at a time, we can develop focus and discipline. We can challenge our minds and bodies. We can set and achieve goals and be recognized. We can be equal. We can find fellowship and develop lifelong friends who will support each other. We can develop the courage to fight back against all the negativity and strengthen our resolve to be the best version of ourselves, without tying that to guilt over who we are today. We can remember that we are enough. And that we can still be MORE. We realize we can make a difference. We matter. We are not alone.

These are trying times. Times that need warriors. Peaceful Warriors. Times that need people like us.

Let's make 2026 the year we FIGHT.

Together.

For all of us.  

Farewell Chuck

 

I met Chuck Mauldin in 1991, during the summer just before I turned fourteen years old. He was 18 and had just graduated high school, and was also the senior student of Randy Moore, aka Sabutai Musashi, Head of the Eternal Dragon School of Ninjutsu in suburban Chicago, a place that would mark my first seven years as the beginning of my 45-year (so far) journey in the martial arts. The Eternal Dragon School was a very traditional dojo that taught Ninjutsu and other budo, and until I was 21 it was basically my home away from home. Chuck became a mentor to me during my critical teenage years and I am very grateful for having had such good fortune.

Chuck was a state-class track and field competitor in high school and a perfect role model for the beginning of my martial arts life. He was a stern disciplinarian, but always took the time to teach and explain, and to carefully instruct me in every technique. More than that, Chuck taught me through his actions and words that martial arts were first and foremost a mental discipline, a physical chess of strategy and tactics that would be won by the smarter man; the man with the greatest willpower. Over the years we trained together, I'm sure I never beat him in sparring, I'm sure I never even came close. That said, he always made me feel like I had done OK, and that my skills were improving. The mark of a truly great senpai.

After college, he became a law enforcement professional, working as a dispatcher for the DuPage county sheriff's department and later in the private sector as a professional bodyguard. He guarded many notable celebrities and executives, eventually becoming a highly sought-after executive security consultant and instructor at the prestigious ESI Academy in Colorado. From time to time he would visit Japan for work and very kindly would always find time to catch up over a meal.

Chuck inspired me to walk the warrior path originally, even more so than my teachers at the time. He showed me what this life could be and who I could become if I ever learned to master myself the way he had (I'm still working on it). The times when he would pick me up at school and drop me off after training were filled with him sharing the wisdom and knowledge I desperately needed, like the big brother I always wished I had. I was immensely proud of the life he made for himself and maybe, in a certain way, he was proud of me too. I'd like to think he respected me for making my life in Japan and staying on the path all these years, even if it was never my full-time occupation like it was for him.

A month ago, our mutual friend Ray, now retired from the DuPage county sheriff's department, let me know that Chuck had suffered a severe stroke and was now in a wheelchair. That was very hard for me to imagine, since I can only picture him as being larger than life, dynamic and physical. It was even harder this morning to receive news of his untimely passing. Part of me feels he just couldn't accept being anything less than the superhero he had been all of his life, and chose to let go on his own terms. A true warrior to his last breath.

The world is a darker place today with him being gone. I'm so grateful for the knowledge and wisdom he invested in me. He will never be forgotten.

I will miss you, Chuck, my senpai, my friend. I'll see you again before too long.

Rest In Power 

The Value of Opinions - resistance and resilience

 

The world has become very polarized in recent years. It feels like somehow public opinions have shifted to extremes, as the media accentuates our differences rather than highlight what the majority of us have in common.

On one hand, many people excuse their lack of critical thinking or research skill by claiming that their opinions, however fantastical, should be not just protected but embraced. On the other hand, we see an unprecedented and draconian crackdown on the freedom of speech itself which, for Americans like me, is the bedrock of our democratic society. Many people now falsely believe that in addition to their right to have and voice their opinion, that they should be allowed to impose their beliefs on other people against their will, denying them the same equal freedom of expression. 

The Truth, as always, lies somewhere in the middle.

Perhaps in a well-meaning effort to avoid offending so-called "marginal" members of our society, we have failed to challenge even the most outrageous viewpoints. People are allowed to excuse intellectual laziness, a lack of curiosity and indulgence in fantasy by hiding behind a seemingly impenetrable wall of entitlement and malaise that somehow make living in modern society challenging at best, impossible at worst.

Everyone, in his/her/they/their own way now has an increasingly desperate need to be "seen". To be validated and endorsed by society and treated like the unique and special snowflakes they know they are. As brilliantly stated by arch-villain Syndrome in the 2004 movie "The Incredibles", "Everyone can be super...and when everyone is super, no one will be". 

Modern young people identify with a long list of tick-boxes covering every perceived limitation, using these excuses as a way of avoiding anything challenging or bothersome. In fact, not claiming all your potential disabilities (ADHD/spectrum, anxiety, stress, gender fluidity, etc) may be a disadvantage since these labels conveniently afford a variety of benefits (including actual monetary benefits). Many of them are highly subjective and extremely difficult to validate, so in effect, you are if you say you are. I can't think of anyone (including myself) who has not been plagued by anxiety, for example, but at what point would it be considered debilitating?

This results in a society where people continue to claim exemptions and benefits they may not truly need, thereby denying these scarce resources to others who might need them more. Everyone ends up calling in sick at the slightest hint of inconvenience or bother, and society becomes just a series of half-hearted excuses for why we just "didn't feel like it" on any given day. Of course, real mental health issues are very serious, and need effective coping strategies. It is here that the lines get blurry.

In the end, the crisis of society has been a loss of the essential quality of maturity - Resilience

As my dear friend "Physics Man" correctly pointed out over our recent pizza lunch (where we solve all the problems of the world over pizza slices and draft beer), resilience requires resistance.

We talked about our fathers' (and their fathers') generation. They grew up in hardship and war and faced tremendous challenges to survive. Many endured unbelievable tragedy and loss and yet still found a way to raise us with abundance. They faced life head-on and stalwartly kept moving forward like the heroes they were. They hardly complained, but rather just got on with things. They did not document their victories with selfies. The extreme resistance they faced resulted in their unbreakable resilience. You simply cannot have one without the other.   

In the past, we were free to challenge each other's opinions. In academics, debate and discussion were key aspects of learning and we were expected to develop strong critical thinking and logical skills to be able to make and defend our perspectives. We learned to argue our merits on the basis of logic but also on the basis of emotion (morality) and to bring the data to back up what we believed. Outrageous claims and hypotheses were quickly debunked and, hopefully, we all learned how to engage in the spirited dialog that leads to understanding.

Somewhere along the way, however, in our desire to create "safe spaces" and avoid "triggering" people, we stopped challenging each other. Not only were we expected to respect others rights to have opinions, and to voice opinions, but we were expected to tolerate them and embrace them, however fantastical. In line with the law of unintended consequences, by failing to provide any resistance to ideas which were clearly devoid of merit we created a society where we no longer become mentally resilient.

Yes, in a spirit of compassion we should allow space for the vulnerable to be themselves. We must grant them a voice and empower them to stand up and be proud of their authenticity. We should defend and protect those in need. This includes not only the right to an opinion but also the right to voice it. Without this, our society can never prosper.

At the same time, we must offer resistance as needed. This must not be permitted to be done with malice or cruelty. It can and should be done with directness and kindness. We must continue to challenge fantasy (and misinformation) with truthfulness, data and logic. We must continue to challenge each other to be able to contribute to society as much as possible; to be net givers rather than net takers wherever possible. To find a way to move forward despite limitations. To challenge ourselves and each other to do and be more - to strive for our true personal excellence. This means working toward a positive and inclusive society that does not excuse mediocrity or laziness but requires that each of us continue to do the very best we can, together. This is also compassion. There is virtue in achievement and resilience. 

Herein lies the martial arts.

My training has enabled me to face all of life's challenges and my own limitations and rise to meet them. Rather than making excuses, I developed the discipline to find my way and navigate the various challenges I faced, both internal and external. I failed a lot, and still do. Nevertheless, I became strong enough to stand back up and keep going. I am a believer that martial arts is a great way to build the resistance that helps us become truly resilient to the hardships of life.

Likewise, the study of zen constantly reminds us of our own infinite smallness. This is so important, lest we succumb to the ego and start to believe in our own importance. Yes, we have the right to opinions and yes, we have the right for those opinions to be voiced. However, for the most part, our opinions, however valid, are of no importance to anyone but ourselves. The quest for truth and wisdom is indeed a solitary one.

As I approach my 59th birthday, I will continue to build my resilience to the challenges of my life. I will abhor excuses and try to face my failings with grace. I will continue to develop my opinions and remind myself to keep them to myself unless asked. I will do my best to avoid trying to persuade others to follow my beliefs and allow them to have their own. I will continue to respectfully challenge others and require them to develop their keen logical minds as I develop mine. I will remind myself often of my insignificance and the wonder I feel at the privilege of being alive. I will continue to love and allow myself to be loved.

See you at class.