It's easy to fall into the twin traps of victimization or unworthiness. On one hand, many of us (myself included) have times where we think "why me?". It's like the Universe itself is conspiring against us to destroy our carefully laid plans, rain on our parade, or keep us from getting what we think we deserve.
Likewise, when good things happen we find it hard to believe that something special could happen to "someone like us" as though we do not deserve to have positive outcomes or to achieve our goals since somehow, deep in our hearts, we do not consider ourselves "worthy" or "lucky".
The truth, neither good nor bad, is that we are always right where we are meant to be. When good things happen, it is important not to attribute them to simple blind luck, but to consider (and more importantly, to acknowledge) the positive impact our efforts and the efforts our supporters have had on our achievements. Failing to do so robs us of our recognition that effort matters, effort is directly linked to outcome, and that cooperation is of paramount importance in accomplishing the things we set out to do. We are products of our hard work, and also of other peoples' work on our behalf.
The victimization/persecution side is far more difficult. It is easy to start believing everything and everyone is "out to get us". The truth is that as much as I am a product of my hard work and the support of others, I am also a result of overcoming the many challenges I have faced - some of which have not resulted the intended outcomes. Without those experiences, I could not have developed confidence in my ability to achieve. Neither could I have learned some of the most important lessons I have been taught, much of which came from careful study of what happened when I thought I failed.
I think we are consistently faced with challenges that offer us opportunity to excel. In doing so, we can develop a platform of successful habits and skills that over time give us the flexibility to conquer the unknown and to do so confidently, secure that come what may, we can find a way (with help, of course). In the tough times, instead of thinking "why me?" I try to ask myself "what am I meant to learn from this?" and focus myself on taking away something of value from every situation - especially the ones which ended badly for me.
I am grateful for my experiences, good and bad, which have brought me to this point almost 51 years later. I'm still here - exactly where I am supposed to be. I hope I still have a lot more life left in me, and with your guidance and support, I want to keep challenging myself to be better than before.
Come along. A journey worth taking is worth taking TOGETHER.
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