The Boomerang Effect

When I was maybe nine or ten years old I got a boomerang as a present from someone who visited Australia.  I was fascinated, and immediately I went to the park to test it out.  Time and again I lobbed the boomerang and it never came back.  Of course, nothing is ever so simple.  There's a lot to learn about boomerang throwing technique.  In fact, there's a lot of science behind it.  Maybe all Aussie kids innately know how to do this but we Chicagoans certainly do not.  After reading a bunch about it (using encyclopedias, since the Internet did not exist back then) I applied some practice and eventually was able to get it to come back pretty regularly.

Aside from its original intended use as a weapon, there is a lot to learn from the humble boomerang.

First, you must LET GO
The boomerang obviously cannot travel and return without you first letting go (via throwing).  There is an obvious metaphor here in that most of our life is like this.  Grasping onto anything too tightly keeps it from accomplishing its goal.  This applies to emotions as much as it does to people.  Learning the importance of letting go is one of the foundation achievements toward attaining happiness.

The Necessity of TRUST
Of the many things we must let go of, FEAR is probably the first and most important.  Fear and worry dominate us and keep us in a state of inaction and paralysis.  Moment by moment, day by day our lives escape us and we fail to act - because we worry and are afraid.  We fear so many things: rejection, anger, loss, sadness.  Most of what we fear never happens anyway.  Regardless, the feelings are real and can keep us from working towards the happiness we deserve.

When I first started to try my boomerang, I was hesitant to throw it because I worried that it wouldn't return.  That would make me feel inadequate - like a failure.  Of course it didn't return.  With a heavy sigh I walked over and got it, hoping nobody was watching.  As I kept trying, I started to worry that I would never actually be able to do it.  Maybe the boomerang was broken or defective.  That was far easier to accept than the truth - my own lack of understanding and practice was keeping me from success.

It would have been easy to give up and hide the boomerang away in the back of my closet or under the bed.  Somehow, I had faith and trust that eventually I could figure it out.  Not only did I practice, I studied other sources of information until I got a better training plan together.  With some additional time investment, I learned how to do it, theory and all, and felt proud of the accomplishment.  I was glad I didn't give up.

It's important to trust in ourselves and our ability to achieve, given enough study and practice.  Most worthwhile skills do not come easy, and learning the value of persistence/perseverance sets us up for success better than almost anything else.  This is not arrogance or overconfidence.  Rather, it is a simple awareness of the relationship between preparation, effort and outcome that underpins every skill we ever master.

In relationships, too, it is easy to imagine that every new person we engage will have the same flaws as the last.  We tell ourselves that because it didn't work out last time, nothing will ever work out in future.  The Monkey Mind deceives us into believing we shouldn't trust others when in fact trust is the cornerstone of all happy relationships.

Everything Starts with YOU
Standing there holding the boomerang tightly and waiting for something to happen is ridiculous.  It can't come back if you don't throw it.  However, many people are waiting for someone/something to "complete" them or make them happy.  They want someone to love them but take no action to love themselves.  In many cases the same people are afraid to go out, meet new people, or allow new relationships to bloom.  They are frozen with fear and worry, never getting past feeling sorry for themselves and wishing someone would magically appear to "save" them.  So much time is lost just...waiting...

• The emotions we give are the emotions we get - good or bad.
• The love we give comes back to us.
• To forgive ourselves we must forgive others FIRST.
• When we care about others they become empowered to care about us.

It is the responsibility of every one of us to share happiness, love, joy, compassion to everyone wherever and whenever we can.  Each action, however small, starts the wheel turning and ultimately brings those same good things back to us.  Helping others helps us.  Saving others saves ourselves.

Don't wait.  Start now.  Help make the world a little brighter.

Throw the boomerang.  It will return.  I promise.