Paper Dragons

I was inspired by my conversation with Eriko in London last week.
We were a bunch of Japanese (well, not ME, obviously) enjoying dinner at a lovely Japanese restaurant near Holborn in the center of London.

Like many Japanese, Eriko is very loyal to the company.  This is admirable, of course, but my perspective differs.  I explain.

What is a company, after all?
I have set up companies before.  When you do, you receive a piece of paper called a company registration.  That's it. No fanfare, no big deal.  Just a piece of paper (actually a stack of papers).
A company is a legal construct created by society for the purpose of making money in an organized way (I use the term "organized" a bit too freely perhaps).  Legally it exists, but physically it is just a piece of paper.

As I explained to Eriko, I am not loyal to pieces of paper.  Pieces of paper cannot be loyal to me.
Of course, human beings act of behalf of the pieces of paper, and I can be loyal to them (and I am very much so).  However, I never let the paper take the place of the people.  I respect people and their actions, and will never absolve someone who does something wrong by saying "the company made me do it".  Each of us make take personal responsibility for our behavior, and have full accountability for what we say and do, good or bad.

If we argue that companies are made up of people, I contend that this is not the point.  Neither are people simply their resumes.  The paper is no substitute for what it represents.

Since I don't pay much attention to pieces of paper, I find I have more time to focus on the human relationships that the pieces of paper underpin.  In the company, I try to engage people as human beings, rather than business cards, job titles, or powerpoint decks.  I try to solve the human problems, and try to engage my clients person to person, with my goals and theirs aligned, and not caring too much for the pieces of paper behind them. This means that even if someday we were to change companies, we could continue to enjoy and derive value from the human relationship we built and have invested in.

Irrespective of the person's place in the corporate hierarchy, I try to engage everyone as a peer and professional, equally worthy of my time and attention (until they prove me wrong).  Similarly, I try to lead in a human way, not because the org chart says I am the boss.  I try never to focus on the paper more than the person, since it is the human element that I have always found the most interesting and rewarding.

Just as in our weapons work, we try to remember that weapons are not the focus - people are.
When we engage the aggressor, the weapon no longer matters.  Likewise, we learn that almost anything can be a weapon if the attacker has aggressive intent.  Weapons provide context, nothing more.  Paper provides context, nothing more.

In our martial arts lives, too, there are lots of pieces of paper.  I have four black belt ranks (so far).  I am sure no robber or murderer will ever ask to see them.  Likewise, I have never had any of my students ask for them (or about them) after the first class.  In the end, I can either teach or I can't.  I can either do or I can't.  That is up to me, not the paper.  Neither the paper nor the belt can do that in my place.  People obsess over which master (or ultimate great grand pendekar or whatever) is better than whom.  Legitimacy comes from skill and knowledge, NOT from pieces of paper.

Many people spend far too much time worried about those pieces of paper.  So much so that they never truly enjoy the human element, the friendship, the love, the RELATIONSHIPS that in my mind make life worth living.  Humans are amazingly complex, funny creatures.  We have nearly limitless capability.  We are truly born of stars and have their essence within us - we shine brightly.  PEOPLE ARE AWESOME.  Paper is boring.

Please be fiercely loyal to the important people in your life.
Make conscious effort to create, build and sustain the human relationships that are important to you.  Never care more about the paper than the person, especially when that person is YOU.
Spend as much time as possible acquiring knowledge/skills and personal networks that will help you enjoy your life to the fullest.  Keep the papers in the drawer where they belong.

See you at class.

Fathers and Teachers

An FB post from one of my dear friends got me thinking...

When we were in Singapore from 2008-2010 I got hooked on Kali Majapahit, as I described in my last post.  In addition to becoming a driving force in my life, I firmly believed it would help my children so I got my oldest son George, 6 years old at the time, enrolled at KMHQ and took him for Discovery/Kids Class every Saturday.  I loved to watch him in class.

Although the movements were tough and he had trouble being still and concentrating, Guro Lila's charm and skill are irresistible, and soon George was making progress.  He enjoyed being with the other kids, and doing something he knew his Dad loved so much (and still does).  It was something we shared.  He proudly put his framed rank certificates on his wall.  I was so proud of him for that.

So what happened??
After we came back to Japan these was no dojo.  No KMHQ.  Thanks to the trust Guro Fred placed in me, I was allowed to open the KM Japan study group in Roppongi, but we have a single 2-hour slot which we use for our weekly class (beginners and intermediate/advanced).  It was too far away for George to attend, too late on a Friday night, and we had no other days or slots for a class.

Perhaps more importantly, however, was the great difficulty I had teaching him personally, which is common to every teacher I suppose.  The relationship between teacher and father is a very complex one.  In many cases (mine included) my early teachers were proxies for my father, father figures in their own right, offering not just training but also wisdom and guidance for my life.  I counted on their advice and looked up to them in a way I never did ( and maybe never could have) to my real father.  They became the fathers I wished I had.  It was only after becoming an adult that I truly recognized and appreciated everything my real father had done for me, and probably never would have without the training from such good teachers.

Being both teacher and father is very hard for children, especially younger children, since they seem to have a lot of trouble separating the two.  They want their teacher to be fun, joking, playful in the way their father is - not a stern taskmaster.  They want their father to be the heroic figure they see in the dojo with the sticks and barong, not the guy folding laundry, changing diapers or washing the dishes.  It can be tough for them to accept the different facets of the same person.

Very often, the father-teacher is too hard or too lenient on their child.  Too hard and the child hates him and the art and ends up rebelling (I offer the Christian Church as one example, and the phenomenon of the "Tiger Mother" as another).  No parent or martial artist wants that for their child.  Too lenient and the other students sense the favoritism and lose their respect and motivation.  Every veteran martial artist has seen this in one school or another.  Finding the balance is elusive.  I have tried to get my kids interested in aikido and other arts I have studied, hoping they would master the basics and then we could build on that foundation.  However, neither has shown any interest and I feel that pushing them too hard would have the opposite effect.  

I do wish my kids would find the love of martial arts training, especially KM training, that I have, and decide to leverage this for their future success the way like I did.  I hope someday to give them the gift of knowledge that I have spent most of my life studying - my life's work.  I hope one day to do sinawali and sombrada and hubud and all the other drills with them just as I love doing them with my students.  I hope one day to bring them to the Bali Camp, where they can feel the lifelong bonds of fellowship I discovered with other FMA fanatics from across the globe.

Right now I still don't know how to find the right recipe. It was so much easier when they trained at KMHQ just like I did.  If you are in Singapore and enrolled at KMHQ, PLEASE share the gift of your training with your wife and children.  If they go and you don't, ENROLL so you can take this journey together as a family.  Make this a special training time for your family, and celebrate every victory together.  THE FAMILY THAT TRAINS TOGETHER REMAINS TOGETHER.

  

Originality

I still remember my first class at Yan Kit Road with Guro Fred of Kali Majapahit, MG Vince, MG Guillaume, MG Ben, and a handful of others.  It was a turning point in my life that made me discover what I really wanted from my training; from myself and from my life.

I never dreamed I would end up as a Kadua Guro, leading the Japan KM Group with students of my own.  The KG test in July last year, in front of a seminar of fellow martial artists and my students, with MG Ben as my partner, was an unforgettable weekend that marked a proud milestone in my martial arts history and an important step in my career as a KM teacher.  I was pushed to the breaking point, but ended up standing in front, true to the teachings that have brought me this far and made me who I am.
I am grateful for everyone who has been a part of this remarkable journey.

I am still new to Kali Majapahit after only 6 years (despite being a Kadua Guro), having only just gotten a reasonable understanding of the basics, and facing a lifetime of study ahead of me that I am very much looking forward to.  A key part of this learning has been having my own group to be responsible for.  This has caused me to think carefully about every aspect of our curriculum and how to best bring it to my students, who never fail to challenge me with their dedication and curiosity.  I am truly blessed to have such a group in Japan.

When I left Singapore to return to Japan I asked for permission to use the Kali Majapahit logo for a tattoo I got done.  It was special to me because it represented my anchor to a system and a family that has defined my martial arts evolution and brought me so much joy, happiness and development.  I chose to have this tattoo done over an old scar (surgery to remove a benign tumor), which was my own symbolic way of turning something bad into something good; healing old wounds; and giving my a visual cue to look at to remind myself where I came from, and to focus on where I am going.

Since then, Kali Majapahit has grown and evolved, a new team of instructors has been groomed and stepped up to lead the next generation of change - they are skilled, energetic and as dedicated to KM as any of us were in those early days.  New elements have been added to KM such as Parkour/ADD, Tahitian Dance Fitness, and a specialized Western boxing class.  It is very exciting indeed.

The best part of Kali Majapahit is that it grows and evolves, just as we all personally grow and evolve.  Guro Fred has continued to add to his impressive body of knowledge and push ahead into new directions, which has led to the first ever Instructor Training Academy course in Singapore last year, which I was proud to attend.  This year, additional ITA courses are planned for Singapore and Paris.

The Bali Camp has become a gathering of some of the best instructors in the world, sharing training and fellowship during a jam packed week of team teaching, personal development, health/nutrition and overall POSITIVE ENERGY.  Every year it gets better and better, and this will be my 3rd time to attend this incredible event.

Kali Majapahit remains at the heart of how I digest any new body of material I encounter.  Our broad curriculum and Guro Fred's unique way of synthesizing it, has given me "eyes to see" other arts and capture what makes them special and worthwhile.  This is one of the many things I try to give my students as well.

I have attended seminars by other famous martial artists since then, including SSBD and PTK, to name a few.  I always go as a representative of Kali Majapahit, and if they think I am any good as a martial artist or as a human being, they will know that a major contributor has been my training with Guro Fred, Guro Lila, and my other teachers, brothers, and sisters in KM.  I carry my rank as a badge of honor everywhere I go.

We never know where life will take us, but for me Kali Majapahit remains the best way to express everything I have learned.  It is not just a comprehensive, effective Southeast Asian martial arts system, it is a symbol of my break from the traditional barriers to growth and evolution in classical martial arts and in my own life; and it frees me to carry on my martial arts "adventure" learning, growing, expressing throughout the rest of my life.  I am deeply humbled and honored to be able to share it with those close to me.

Never forget where you come from, since it helps point the way to where you are going.
Stay Original.

Boxing

In this case, I am talking about a treasure box.
Why?  What do I mean?

Your martial arts training life is like a box - when you start it is EMPTY.
Over time, you fill it with hopes, dreams, accomplishments, achievements.  You put all the hard work into it, and that hard work becomes treasure that you can then cherish and use.  It becomes VALUABLE.

Of course, the reverse is also true.  If you do not take care to fill your box with these treasured memories and experiences, when you look in the box it will still be empty, with nothing you can draw from it, and no value for you to use.  It is then that you will end up disappointed and feeling empty too.

I raise this example because as much as it is the responsibility of the teacher and fellow students to provide a safe, engaging, and positive environment for you (the dojo),  it is EVERYONE'S own responsibility to be at training, to give 100% to the teacher and each other, and to allow the natural bonds of friendship and fellowship to develop.  You can't win if you don't play.

Please consider the above, and think about the promise you have to yourself and to each other.
Be there for each other and share in the treasure we have created.  Our Treasure Box is Full.
ENJOY!!

See you soon!

Anything and Everything

"How you do anything is how you do everything" - zen master

Have been thinking about this lately while I am on a long, three-week business trip between London and New York.

You can learn so much about someone by observing the little things they do, from making a cup of tea to walking down the street.  You can tell by how they talk to clients, to coworkers, to their family, to their friends.  Are they a different person for these different groups?  Are you?

This has caused me to think about how I engage and interact with the people I meet, from complete strangers to close friends and colleagues, even to my students.  I hope I can be the same person to all of them.  I hope I can listen well and respond with sincerity, energy and passion.  I hope I can be a source of strength for them.

Zen is expressed as the utmost care in every action of every moment of our lives.  It is the Way of being constantly connected to the entire universe in every breath we take.  Easier said than done, to be sure, but it means that AWARENESS is key.  We should be paying attention to the actions we take and the words we use, saying what we mean and meaning what we say, always for the betterment of our universal selves.
This is worthy of reflection, I think.

I find that when travelling it is easier to lose my focus.  The jet lag; the trains, planes, buses, taxi all drain my energy and leave me tired all the time.  I don't sleep well in any bed other than my own, surrounded by my family.  It is precisely at these times that I try to apply an even greater level of awareness and focus, so that I deliberately examine every action, no matter how small.  Maybe I am afraid of drifting away...

It is said the LIFE is what happens while we are waiting for something else.
Don't let this be you.  Be involved and live every moment fully.  You deserve it.

See you back on the mats very soon.

2014

Well.  Here we are.  Welcome to 2014.

Symbolically, we start the year with a clean slate, free from everything that happened in 2013 and ready to start the new year with a new perspective and a fresh, empty stack of paper to write the next chapter of our lives.

As I reflect on 2013, I am very grateful for the support of all my students, who kept me going in the darkest of times.  Thinking about Kali Majapahit, thinking about our classes, thinking about YOU, made such a difference.

In 2014, I want more.
I want more from myself.  I want to show how much I can give you, how much I can help you, how much positive energy I can deliver in each and every lesson - and, ultimately,  in each and every moment of my life.  I want to be a catalyst for positive change in the lives of everyone I meet.

I want more from you, too.
I have told you all many times that Kali Majapahit is not really about fighting.  It is about goal setting and goal achievement.  I want this year to be the year that you make solemn vows to yourself that you will help yourself become who you really want to be - Happy, Healthy, Successful.

I want you to be relentless in taking control of your lives and squeezing every last drop of goodness you can get.  I want you to prove to yourself that you can dream big and achieve big.  I want you to amaze yourself at your own progress, not just in martial arts, but in the measure of your own satisfaction.
THAT'S WHAT THIS IS REALLY ABOUT.  That's what this has ALWAYS been about.
Don't ever let yourself forget it.  Don't ever be willing to compromise when it comes to your own happiness.  Never settle for less than the best.  You deserve it.

I want you to be in a very different place this time next year - proud of your achievements on and off the mats.  I want you to be MORE ALIVE than ever before.

Don't worry.  Don't be afraid. You are not in this alone.  WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.  I cannot walk your path for you, but I can be standing by, ready to give you my full support.  I will be ready to encourage you and energize you, ready to advise you and listen to you.  I promise not to give up on you, just as you have not given up on me.  I want to show how much I can help you to make positive changes that will drive your lives in new and better directions.  I want to challenge you to re-examine yourself, take control, and really move forward in whatever you choose.

Guro Fred gave us 3 words in his New Year Greetings - FOCUS, VISUALIZE, ACHIEVE.
I want you to really think about these and what they will mean to you this year.

FOCUS - do not be distracted by the day-to-day issues.  Keep your Eyes on the Prize.
VISUALIZE - if you can SEE it, you can BE it.
ACHIEVE - let the magic happen.  Let yourself succeed. You CAN.  You WILL.

I want to add my own word for 2014 as well:

BELIEVE - you have the power to make your life the best it can be.  USE YOUR POWER.

Shine brightly.

Getting the Point

Quick update from my previous post.

We made it back from Maui (18 hours door-to-door), but the 9 hour flight back from Honolulu to Narita was absolute agony.  Although I did not break anything and had no internal injuries, I was whiplashed by the wave, and my neck and upper back are still swollen and it hurts just to sit down.  I am not sleeping well (3-4 hours/night max) since every time I toss or turn the pain wakes me up.

I did not go for TCM in Maui since I don't know anyone there (you will understand why by the end of this post), but luckily I was able to get in to see Edward Sensei at his clinic the day after we landed back in Japan.  His clinic was very busy, but he kindly made time for me since I was injured.

Those of you who know me know I am a huge advocate of TCM in general, and of acupuncture and moxibustion in particular.  It is absolute magic for joint/ligament/tendon/muscle pains and injuries, works well for headaches, stress, depression and a wide range of other disorders.  Even if nothing is "wrong" I recommend a monthly "tune-up" to ensure optimal health and balance is maintained.

There are many people who turn their noses up to TCM, calling it "voodoo" or "black magic" and generally of the mind that it doesn't work unless you believe in it.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  The more research is done, the more we come to understand that the holistic view of TCM and preventative medicine is scientifically valid and in many cases far more effective than traditional Western medical treatments.  In a potential life-or-death situation such as I had on Maui, I defer to a Western trauma center, where the Emergency Room staff are specially trained to keep me from dying.  However, keeping me from dying is not the same as keeping me healthy, and the difference is worth thinking about.

Here is my advice on how to evaluate the quality of TCM treatment:

Painless
Good treatment should be painless.  If I feel the needles or get too hot from the moxa, it is a sure sign of an amateur (and that I should find another clinic immediately).  I have had acupuncture treatment in the past and felt the needles hit my spine.  Not good.

Relaxing
Good treatment is relaxing.  Music is soft and instrumental, and care is taken to ensure I am comfortable (not too hot or cold).  Likewise, I should not experience nausea or dizziness from the treatment.  I have received treatment from some clinics (that I will never return to) that made me vomit on the way out.

Sterile
New/clean needles each time please.  Hepatitis (or the stress of worrying about it) should not be part of the treatment.  Good doctors have a very clean and well organized clinic.

Holistic
I expect to be treated as a WHOLE PERSON, not simply at/around the area where I have symptoms.  Unlike western medicine, treatments need not be exactly on the spot of the pain or injury.  Sometimes the best way to treat a site is to focus on the opposite side, for example.

Preventative
Good treatment does not just focus on the current problems, but also seeks to strengthen weak areas so that future issues can be better avoided and mealth can be maintained.  A good doctor will discover areas of concern I didn't mention because they are not bad enough for me to notice them...yet.

Investigative
A good TCM doctor is like a good detective; not just addressing the symptoms, but always questioning to understand and treat the root causes of disorder and disease.  Every patient is different and every treatment situation is unique.

Participative
A good TCM doctor involves me in the process and helps me understand what is going on with my body and how his/her treatment plan will address it.  It is an interactive experience rather than a one-way dialog or lecture.

Transparent
Good practitioners do not try to mystify patients with pseudo-spiritual or religious overlays. Objectives of the treatment are clear and methodologies are open to be shared and explained.
I have learned a great deal about TCM from being treated.  Questions should be welcomed.

Positive
Unlike Western hospitals, TCM clinics are places of HEALING.  Therefore, they and their doctors and staff should radiate a tangible positive energy.  The doctor and staff should exhibit a quiet, relaxed confidence and this is an important and often overlooked part of the treatment.

TRUSTWORTHY
A good doctor works hard to develop a trust relationship with patients.  I do not trust this important treatment to very many people, and knowing/trusting my TCM doctor is paramount.
Be willing  to pay more or travel as far as needed to visit the doctor who is right for you.  Your health is worth it.  Accept no compromise or substitute.

A treatment generally takes an hour or two and can involve any combination of acupuncture, moxibustion and massage, but that depends on what is being done.  A serious session (when I am injured) might be well over 2 hours.  The best thing to do afterward is immediately go home and rest/sleep as long as possible.  It has been my experience that a good session from a skilled doctor is one of the very best remedies for life's bumps and scrapes, and I strongly suggest a monthly visit whether you are injured or not.  It is useful for your TCM doctor to "benchmark" your baseline health, which can help him/her to identify when things get out of alignment and need to be adjusted/corrected.

A lot of our disease and discomfort is caused by stress and tension, and a visit for TCM can help relieve these.  I prefer TCM to chiropractic, since TCM looks carefully at the underlying factors which affect posture and balance.  Chiropractic tends to do an adjustment/alignment, but underlying tension and stress will quickly pull the spine back into the wrong shape if not addressed, resulting in the need for another chiropractic adjustment and so on in an endless loop.

After my experience on Maui, I couldn't get back to Japan fast enough, and I booked an appointment with him as soon as possible.   I have had a lot of treatments from a lot of TCM doctors in my time, and far and away the best I have met so far is Edward Obaidey at Edward Obaidey Acupuncture Clinic in Sangenjaya.  It is with himself, his staff and his clinic in mind that I wrote the above checklist.

If you have not had TCM treatment before, I hope this post will help you take the first steps with an open mind.  If you are a veteran like me, make sure your body is in the right hands by referring to the above and considering your current TCM practitioner.  Better still, go see Edward Sensei.  You (and your body) will be very glad you did.

http://www.edwardshinkyu.com/

ER

Yesterday started off as a usual perfect day in paradise.  We had breakfast at the condo, and made our way to Kamaole III beach nearby.  After setting up the parasol and chairs, it was down into the surf for some boogie boarding.  George got dragged under by a wave and gave up, and I remember telling him to keep at it. "Sometimes life knocks you down, but you have to keep on getting back up".  Life is not without a sense of irony.

In the next set a big wave came and I crested it...and then was driven headfirst into the sand below.  I saw stars and felt lightning down my arms.  I staggered to my feet as the wave washed back, worried that I might drown if I lost conciousness in the surf.  I also wanted to get away from the next wave before it might drag me under.  I crawled onto the beach and discovered my face was filled with blood.

The lifeguards were waiting and got me a few steps further, lying me down while they brought a backboard and neck brace.  In a few minutes they were carrying me up the beach to wait for an ambulance to take me to the ER.  My fingers were burning; my head and neck numb.  My family stood by watching me, shock and horror across their faces.  I am sure I looked pretty bad.

In the ambulance, the paramedics kept asking me to touch my toes together, move my fingers, repeat my name and address - I knew they wanted to keep me out of shock and assess how much potential damage I had to my neck or spine.  They got an IV started and took my vitals.

At the hospital, they kept asking me the same things - move my fingers and toes, repeat my name and address.  Everyone was concerned that I could have serious damage to my C5 cervical spine and/or a possible concussion.  I was X-Rayed and ultimately given CT and MRI as well to ensure there was no bleeding inside my brain.  They took blood and gave me a tetanus shot as well.

After a long day (over an hour lying immobile just in the MRI), the net result was better than expected:  apart from a few stitches in my lip where my face hit the sand, just some minor abrasions and stiffness/soreness.  I am not dead (it happens).  I am not paralyzed (it also happens) or permanently injured.  I did not break my neck or my back, and did not even break my nose.  I did not get a concussion and did not chip any teeth. I have no internal injuries, broken bones or dislocations.  I do not have a long hospital stay or months of agonizing physical therapy ahead.  I have been incredibly lucky.

I believe that martial arts had a big hand in saving my life and health yesterday.
At first, I was able to keep myself concious and stay focused on getting out of the water and out of danger. My survival instinct is honed a bit better than the average person it seems.  Martial arts training has also made me acutely aware of my own body, and this helped me to understand my condition and be able to communicate exactly what I felt.  It also helped me stay calm and focused as I dealt with all the changing situation and the possible outcomes I might have been facing.  I used my training to remain still during over an hour in MRI so they could get good quality images to assess possible spinal/cervical swelling or brain damage.

I had several hours to think about my life and how lucky I am.  Lucky for my training.  Lucky for my family. Lucky for every breath I take and every step I travel.  Lucky to have come to such a beautiful place. Luckier still to have come so close to losing so much, and to be able to get up and walk away.

Accidents happen.  The best we can do is to try to be prepared and be willing to accept whatever comes our way.  I am well aware of the fact that I will die someday, but until this morning I hadn't really thought about the fact that it could have been yesterday - in the surf off Kamaole III public beach near Kihei, HI.

Much mahalo to everyone who helped me yesterday, from lifeguards to paramedics to ER staff to doctors and neuro specialists.  Thank you for making sure I am not broken.

I wish you all a joyful holiday season.  Keep your loved ones close.  Count your blessings.  Cherish each day.  See you soon.  

Seeing

I saw the picture at left on Facebook, and it really got me thinking.
So much of what we encounter in our life is based on our perception - rather than the actual thing itself.  We think we see reality, but in fact we only see what we think is real at the time.  It is at best a "temporary reality", at worst having no resemblance whatsoever to reality.

This applies to objects, but also to events, people, situations...relationships.

Guro Fred taught me about the Law Of Attraction --- look it up.  Study it well.  It's true.

All the time, our attitude is what determines what we see, and how we see.  The more I think about the passage in the picture the more I come to understand that the true keys to happiness are never found anywhere but in ourselves.  We already have them.  We choose to be happy or sad because we decide how to see the world around us.  In many cases we deliberately put a negative filter on things, which causes us to see things in a negative way.  We could also choose to see things in a  positive way.

Regular meditation is the best way to reset our sense of perspective and come as close as we can to seeing things as they really are - limitless and boundless, neither good nor bad, connected at the deepest level --- and ONE WITH US.

To make your life better, the only choice is CHANGE.  Until we are willing to change, we can have no hope whatsoever of seeing the world differently.

Please think carefully about this.

The Art of Unbalancing

This topic has been on my mind all week - from my private session to the Friday open class.  In fact, I guess I have been thinking about it more and more since my seminar in Singapore with Guro Maul Mornie of Silat Suffian Bela Diri.  He called it out specifically, and it ties back to older discussions with Sifu Frank on Wing Chun and Guro Fred on Kali and even my days in Yoshinkan Aikido with Sensei Mike.  From different perspectives, all of these masters were saying essentially the same thing.

Unbalancing is at the heart of all good martial arts technique.

We often think of unbalancing as a specific technique we use - sweeps or foot traps, or as a result of something else, for example our opponent falling down from our strong punch to the jaw.

The reality is very different.  Our goal should ALWAYS be to attack the structure; the balance of the opponent, rather than to cause specific injury. Aside from the valid moral philosophy that we martial artists should be wise enough to cherish all life and that "do no harm" should be a daily mantra for us, seeking to cause injury is inefficient technique.  Even if I can cause injury, I will always be close enough that my opponent can injure me at the same time (uchiai 打ち合い to all you kenjutsu practitioners out there).  Injuring my opponent may not always cause them to stop their aggression.  In fact, it may even increase their aggression.  Beyond the Buddhist principle of causing no harm, a healthy dose of self-preservation makes me want to not get hurt much more than my wanting to hurt someone else.

Thus, efficient technique always seeks to disrupt the structure and balance of the opponent from the first initial contact - turning their head/neck/spine or removing their base, which compromises the opponent's ability to generate strength and power and weakens their ability to resist.  Subconsciously, we always seek to recover our balance as a priority - spiritually/mentally as well, more on this topic another time - and this takes concentration away from counterattack.

This can be achieved by almost any technique, but several principles help understand what to do:
1) pulling - the simplest method, and the easiest to resist.  Pulling is much better when used a split-second before pushing
2) pushing - more effective than pulling, and stronger still when not done in a straight line.  Pushing into circles (rowing) can be extremely effective since it is harder for the opponent to find a line of resistance
3) absorbing - this can cause the opponent's momentum to carry them off balance and yield great opportunities
4) misdirecting - changing the line of the opponent's motion can lead to powerful unbalancing

In practice, we often apply our entries and techniques without remembering to unbalance our partner.  We think because we are training, there is no need or that it is rude/disrespectful/unfriendly to do so.  Sadly, this habit will prevent us from developing the correct muscle memory and instinctive reaction to take balance, which is precisely the skill we should value over all else.  Mastering this concept can help us to diffuse aggressive intent without having to injure an aggressor.  This is the pinnacle of martial arts achievement.

I suggest looking back through the various techniques you know and reconsidering how they work.
Reverse engineer them to understand where the contact points are, especially the entries, and consider carefully how to use them in the principles above to unbalance the opponent as quickly as possible.

In training, use your techniques to cause unbalance every time.  Note:  this does not mean slamming your partners to the mats.  Instead, it means using the techniques for their intended purpose - to understand human structure and how to influence it.  Subtle movements will show you when your partner's balance is being broken.  In training it is fine to allow your partner to recover.  In reality once the balance is taken away, never give it back until the situation is resolved.  It is up to you how much more than that you need for each specific encounter or set of circumstances.

Study this well.    

47

wow.  I am 47 years old today.   (note: in case you didn't get it, the picture is brought to you by the number 47 - kthxbye)

Every year, I like to make a special blog post for my birthday, so here it is.

The question I have been thinking about today is:

"How do I feel?"

GRATEFUL.  I think that best describes it.  I have had (and still have) an awesome life.  I have my fair share of challenges, which is as I would like it, but I am (reasonably) healthy of body and mind, surrounded by loving friends and family, and doing work I feel passionate about.

Furthermore, this year I realized a dream I have had for more than 5 years - I was the first person (so far) in Japan to test and pass our Kali Majapahit black belt test and qualify as an instructor.  My students were there, my wife was there, my teachers were there, many friends were there --- it was a magic moment celebrating my commitment to Kali Majapahit, and my achievement so far. My martial arts journey has gone on for more than 30 years, and I am so proud it has led me to this point.  I am profoundly GRATEFUL to my teachers, students, brothers and sisters in the martial arts.  You complete me.

I remain (thankfully) married to the most amazing and wonderful woman in the world, my wife Sanae.  Her wisdom and strength has helped me through so many challenges, and her support has always kept me going, even in my darkest hours.  I would have avoided many of the troubles I faced if I had followed her advice more and been less stubborn/more patient.  She alone knows all the ghosts that haunt me, and finds a way to love me anyway, even when I hate myself - which I find amazing.  I have learned so much from her, and hope I will continue to do so.  Of all the many wrong decisions I have made in my life, marrying her means I got the most important decision 100% right.  Sanae, I love you so much and I am so GRATEFUL for your love in return.
Thank you for never giving up on me.  I promise to keep trying to be the partner you deserve.

Likewise, I am GRATEFUL for my handsome and wonderful boys (who thankfully look a lot like their mother).  I have learned so much from you, and you never fail to challenge me to do and be more than I ever thought I could.  You fill my life with boundless (noisy?) energy, but I would never wish for anything else.  You have both grown so fast, absorbed so much, and you are truly the best things to have ever happened to me.  I am so lucky to be your father.  I know you will continue to make me proud.

I am GRATEFUL to have my job.  I went through nearly 2 years looking for the next opportunity after I "retired"from investment banking.  I wasn't sure this job was it, but my boss and my co-workers gave me such a warm welcome and have really made me feel valued and respected.  The past year has been hard, harder than I ever could have imagined, but having all of you by my side has made me want to hang in and do my best every day.  Thank you all for being with me on those late-night calls.  Thank you for believing in me.

It has been my life in martial arts that has allowed me to achieve the many goals I have set for myself.  Despite my frequent setbacks, the training has helped me become the person I want to be.  I have developed my confidence, learned to control my fear and uncertainty, been able to trust myself, and been willing to stay the course even when it has been inconvenient.
Martial arts has given me an unending feeling of GRATITUDE for my life.
I am especially grateful to be sharing it with you.

Thank you all for your constant support.  

Fun is Fun and Done is Done

"As soon as man is born he begins to die"

This quote on the hat of a prepubescent girl on the subway train, who most likely hadn't the slightest idea what it says, let alone what it meant.
I have been thinking about this a lot since then.

At first, I was shocked at the blunt reality of it.
Then, I felt depressed.  I mean, it's true. We are dying from the moment we are born, and our life's journey has only one possible inevitable destination - death.  It awaits us all: rich or poor, black or white.  There is no avoidance of this.

The more I thought about it, however, the more I changed from feeling depressed to feeling motivated.  All life is precious, and like all precious things, it has value because it is finite.

The fact that we are dying immediately from the moment we are born should help us to remain focused, and not to waste our time on things which are not worth our time - negative emotions, negative people, negative habits.  Mae West famously quoted, "we only live once, but if we live right once is enough".  So what is "living right"?

For everyone, this answer must be slightly different.  In my case, I am grateful for having fulfilled my basic needs for food, shelter, clothing, health for myself and my family, I can consider increasing the quality of my life as a key objective in achieving and maintaining my happiness.

I want to spend as much time as possible doing the things I love: I love Kali (and teaching Kali), I love helping people, I love solving problems, I love to talk and discuss with people.  I am a communicator.  I love reading and writing.  I love learning new things.  I love cooking.  I love my dogs.  I love the beach. I love to travel.  I love learning languages.  I love music.  I love to help people feel better and more motivated.  I love to laugh and I love a good joke.  I love to be a catalyst in helping people decide to change and improve their lives.

I want to pack as much of those things into my life as I can.

At the same time, I would not be happy unless I had challenges to help me grow.  I need to have challenges which force me out of my comfort zone.  Challenges which I can not only be accountable to solve, but also have responsibility to solve, by using my creativity and insight.
I need to have adventures which help me find out new things about myself.

Awareness of our own mortality should motivate us strongly to want to be productive and efficient, to set goals and go after them passionately.  It should help us focus on positive actions and empowerment rather than be consumed and distracted by anger, hatred, jealousy, or revenge.

In a few weeks I will be 47 years old.  Maybe I am halfway through my life already, maybe more. Hopefully less.  regardless, I know someday I will die, and I resolve to make the most I can out of this human experience this time.  I hope you will, too.

What do you think about that hat and the quote?  How does it make you feel?

Let me know.

The Ladder

(Thanks for the inspiration Kerri)

I am so very grateful for the life I have had.  In many, ways it has exceeded my expectations, often bringing me happiness and success far beyond anything I could ever have imagined.

When I set out on my life's big adventure across the world, leaving Chicago and everything I had ever known behind, I could not even dream of what I would find here in Japan.  This is not to say that there have not been many challenges over the past 22 years since I left, but to say that the good things I experienced and the knowledge I gained have been precious, and that back home in the sleepy suburb of Villa Park, the type of life I found was almost completely beyond my understanding.

I have always been lucky to have great teachers.  These amazing people seem to show up just when I need them, and to offer me guidance and wisdom so that I can continue to make the choices that yield such extraordinary results.  This is part of why I feel so truly blessed.

Life is about the experience, and leaving everything behind and moving to Osaka in 1991 was such a fantastic experience for me.  Just making it here took 10 years of effort and three failed attempts (an interesting story of its own), but completing this quest taught me that with hard work and commitment I could really achieve any goal I ever set for myself, and that continues to be the case.  It gave me unshakable confidence in my ability to find a way forward, even through situations I could never have anticipated.  One way or another, I have always got to where I wanted to be, usually far beyond my own expectations.  The ripples of the stone in the water go far beyond what we can predict before we toss the stone in.

I truly believe that success is found when we are in tune with the Voice of our soul. Helena Bhavatsky's excellent (and heavy) occult tomes (The Secret Doctrines) shed some light on it, and in retrospect my many long discussions with Guro Fred Evrard, who is an insightful spiritual guide, helped me gain a better understanding of this particular interpretation.

Many of us believe we are put here for a purpose, and according to this theory, our soul (the immortal essence of us) has a mission to achieve in order to proceed on the path toward enlightenment.  Our soul will seek to heal itself (as will our body), and seeks not only to fulfill spiritual destiny, but also to restore our karmic balance and make progress toward the ultimate goal of Satori.  We are most successful when we act in accordance "in tune" with what the soul wants.  These moments "in tune" are not times of delirious, babbling joy.  Rather, they are experienced as feelings of peacefulness, contentment and satisfaction; the subconscious awareness of PURPOSE.

According to Bhavatsky, we are born carrying not only physical characteristics from our parents, but spiritual ones as well.  Our souls have imprinting not only from our past lives, but also from the circumstances under which we have taken this human form this time.  The emotional baggage of our parents becomes ours, as well as the mission we were given this time - to balance, to heal, and to continue our progress toward enlightenment.  One explanation for our "natural abilities" is that they are leftovers from achievements in our past lives that the soul has kept into this life, despite the fact that generally speaking, the specific memories are all wiped clean each time. When the body dies, the soul sleeps, and waits for another chance to improve itself and continue the sacred journey.

It becomes then critically important to listen to the voice of the soul, which should give us direction into how to achieve the tasks that will restore our spiritual balance and lead us toward our ultimate enlightenment.  Pierre Teilhard de Chardin elegantly said that "we are not human beings having a spiritual journey, we are spiritual beings having a human experience".  So...how do we do that?

Our earliest and easiest experience of our soul's voice comes when we are dreaming.  This is a chance not only to expunge the subconscious, but also to be close enough to our resting state to experience this voice.  Sadly, many people do not remember their dreams and so cannot remember what their soul told them.

The very best way is through prolonged meditation.  The mind at rest can truly LISTEN, and can be trained to hear this voice.  I say "prolonged not in the sense of being sat for endless hours of Zazen, although this is an admirable thing.  Rather I mean that for most people, it takes years of practice to be able to filter the noise and truly hear the voice.  We must meditate in order to:

• hear the Voice --- become aware that the soul is trying to reach our current consciousness
• listen to the Voice --- begin to hear the words our soul is saying
• understand the Voice --- begin to understand the meaning of the words
• believe the Voice --- recognize the benefit of following the guidance of the soul
• remember the Voice --- keep the words after meditation so we can implement them

These steps take time to master.  To be perfectly clear, the Voice is our soul telling us what we need to do in this human life to fulfill our spiritual destiny.  As we are inherently GOOD beings, this Voice will never tell us to kill our neighbor, blow up a building, or some other negative thing.  The guidance is always to help us return to righteousness so we can achieve spiritual balance, heal ourselves, and progress toward enlightenment.  EVIL never yields anything but more evil.  That can be the voice of many things (organized religion? prejudice?) but it will NOT be the voice of your soul.  In fact, when we harm others, we cause delays in our growth as the soul must find balance again and heal itself, which takes time.  Although this is an infinite journey, our soul gives us a sense or urgency as it seeks to reach enlightenment.  Since our soul bears the scars of negative traumas inflicted on us, and the negative traumas of what we have inflicted on others when we do not listen to the Voice, achieving balance and healing usually involves the positive acts of helping others, displaying compassion, and contributing to growth in order to erase these "karmic debts".

In my case, my original teacher taught me meditation and I began to hear the voice when I was in my early teens.  I knew somehow that I belonged in Japan, and driving my life toward that goal become my sole preoccupation (together with martial arts training, which facilitated it).  I did not know what would happen when I got here, but I knew this was where my life would happen.  The 10-year struggle to get here was part of restoring my balance, establishing my faith in myself, and cementing my confidence to progress.  It brought me to the many teachers I have had since, and has given me a life of rich experience far beyond my teenage dreams in suburban Chicago.

It also showed me another important lesson --- You do not need to know your DESTINATION in order to know your DIRECTION.  I did not know what I would find here, but I knew I would find what I was looking for.  Not knowing the right answers should never stop us from asking the right questions.

This is a long post, with some heavy-duty stuff in it.  However, I promise if you follow your daily practice of meditation with the explicit goal of hearing/listening/understanding/believing/remembering you will find your insight and your True Path.

Your soul will thank you for it.    

Throwing Down

Last week when I was in Singapore, I stopped by KM HQ to join some classes and see my brothers and sisters there.

Unexpectedly I got asked to run some beginner and intermediate/advanced classes with the other instructors. Always a pleasure, we found some cool things to show.

MG Guillaume specifically asked me if I would focus on locking and throwing, given these are a large part of my martial arts history prior to starting KM.

We worked on several variations of a common theme around Koshi Nage/Koshi Gurumua/Oguruma and Seioinage.  As a follow up, I summarize the integral parts of throwing below.  I will use japanese vocabulary, but leave out the Kanji, feel free to contact me if you want to know them.

1) Distraction (Atemi)
Often overlooked, all throws really start with striking the opponent.  Atemi can be done with actual hand strikes (slaps, palm heels, punches, elbows), as well as any other weapons including headbutts, knees, low-kicks and even using the biceps, shoulders, or torso (Tai Atari).  This step is important, since we need to divert the opponent's attention from the rest of the movement.

For some styles of judo/aikido, the atemi is de-emphasized, minimized, or removed and this then loses combat effectiveness in my opinion.  The atemi need not end the fight (although this is OK, too), but it must disrupt the opponent's focus and start the process of destroying the balance/structure that will ultimately take the opponent through the rest of the technique. Atemi are generally aimed at the head/neck, but can work against the body/legs provided they disrupt the attacker's balance as explained above.

2) Contact (Sekkin)
For any throwing technique to be effective, we need to get (and maintain) contact with the opponent.  This means closing distance, and generally involves being body-to-body in some orientation (back to front or front to front) Very often, this contact begins with a touchpoint on the arms.  In sport judo, we see the competitors locked up in grabs on the dogi, similar to pummeling in wrestling.  This contact point facilitates the subsequent steps and a typical defense/reversal against throwing is to deny the opponent sekkin by pushing their hips or body away.

3. Entry (Irimi)
The entry is achieved when we have made body to body contact.  This is generally done in a very ballistic manner, with the express intent of displacing the opponent's hips with our own, in effect "punching with the hips" (see "Kuzushi", below).  In some situations, the first three steps (atemi, sekkin, irimi) are done as a single motion, but they should be understood as distinct components with separate objectives.  When entering, we generally seek to establish contact with our center of gravity (Tan dien) lower than our opponent's.  To succed, it is important to have the opponent's hips completely displaced, which means driving our hips fully across theirs.  Partial displacement usually results in the opponent sliding off to one side or otherwise failing to have the balance broken or be loaded.

4. Breaking the Balance (Kuzushi)
In order to throw the opponent, it is necessary to break the balance, which is done by destroying the structure.  This can be done by moving/twisting the head/neck/spine, but also can be achieved by sweeping the legs or reaping the legs (ashi barai/ashigari).  In some cases, a clothesline is done with the arms, while in others the opponent is made to trip over the extended leg.  Failure to achieve proper Kuzushi is probably the single most common reason why throws fail (the other is probably the failure to use Atemi).

5. Loading (Mochiage)
Loading is the process by which, having displaced the opponent's hips with our own, we put the opponent's center of gravity (hips) onto ours.  This is done with the legs bent, so that the actual lift is achieved by straightening the legs, NOT by pulling/lifting with the arms.  Judo is like rock climbing in that the arms are used for balance/contact and the legs are used for drive/lift. Loading can be hard to see when it is done as part of a reaping throw (Osotogari, for example), but if you watch carefully, you should be able to see where the hips are loaded.

6. Execution (Nage)
Now that the opponent's body is loaded and under control, we DRIVE.  A properly done throw should combine our body weight with our opponent's and drive them ballistically through the ground, not merely "toss/release".  When we extend our legs and bend forward, we also want to establish a new connection (usually through the shoulder or hip) that will anchor our bodyweight to the opponent and allow us to drive our weight through them into the ground.

Aikido tends to use controls/locks and projections, the difference being that when we project, we release the opponent, who then contacts the ground on their own - without our bodyweight added.  When throwing, at no point should we release the opponent, and we strongly intend to add our body weight, sandwiching the opponent between us and the ground when we land.

7. Control (Shime/Osae/Newaza)
While projections are generally designed to toss/release the opponent, throws intend the opponent to contact the ground in close proximity, preferably with our bodyweight on top.  This facilitates a variety of mounts such as top mount, side mount, and scarf hold, which lead us into controls/submissions/finishes including breaks, dislocations, chokes, and strangles.  Done properly, the throw is a strong shock and jolt to the opponent which may already render them unconscious or winded, but which in any case causes a moment of pause on impact which can be exploited to move directly into a control or finish..  In some cases, the throw alone can cause concussion or serious injury, particularly when combined with a lock applied before throwing.

Throws can be a very important part of a good fighter's arsenal, and change the CQB dynamic considerably.  However, like any good technique, the proper principles need to be followed to get the right result.

These are my views on the important components to good throwing.  I encourage you to research on your own.

See you on the mats.

The Rule of 10,000

Many of us have heard about the "Rule of 10,000".  It refers to the fact that studies have shown 10,000 hours of study is needed to "master" a skill.  However, let me tell you about another such "Rule of 10,000".
I call this one "The Rule of 10,000 Steps."

Two weeks ago, my acupuncture doctor, Edward Obaidey Sensei, who is fantastic by the way, suggested getting a pedometer and walking at least 10,000 steps every day.  He said that this low impact exercise could contribute to my overall health goals, and do so without risking damage to my knees or other "runner injuries", which he sees plenty of at his clinic.  I went out and bought a counter right away to give it a try.

I have found that carrying the counter in my pocket raises my awareness of how much I walk.  I walk a bit more than before in order to be sure to hit my 10k mark every day and have a much better sense of distance than I used to.  In the first few days I averaged between 5k and 8k, but now I hit at least 10k daily, and often more than 12k on a busy day. 10,000 steps usually equates to just over 7 km of walking distance, and seems to consume about 650 KCal of energy.  While this is surely not the equivalent of an hour at Crossfit, it is a habit that has been pretty easy to set and maintain, and I feel better for it.

I am a very big believer in setting in motion small, simple positive habits that can have a lasting effect on the quality of life.  I truly think this "rule of 10,000 steps" is a great place to start.  I will update more as I continue to count my way to a healthier life - one step at a time.

300

300 posts.  wow.

So I have now reached 300 posts on my blog.  I started this blog back in 2005 with the intention of discussing the finer points of aikido training that we did not have time for in class.  Over time, it has evolved into a place where I could document my focus changing from Yoshinkan to Kali Majapahit, and the various similarities and differences between them.

My blog has spanned the range between technical posts, informative/cultural/historical posts, and philosophy/spirituality.  I have also posted on personal growth and development, as I think this is a principal goal of martial arts training.  A large portion of my posts were inspired by people around me and I thank you for always sharing your thoughts and asking questions that make me think.  

I am very proud to say that my blog now has over 17,500 page views and I have received a lot of supportive comments from my readership.  Although I can say that the blog was for my own benefit, it still feels good to have reached so many people and to believe that my entries have had a positive effect on them.

I don't have any specific plan for this blog other than to continue to document my thoughts as I grow and change in my martial arts life.

I am happy to try to tackle any topics that come up, so I encourage you readers to table anything you would like me to discuss.

In closing, thank you everyone for your kind support and attention over these past 8 years.

With much gratitude,

John

I'm Afraid Not

Yesterday my 11 year old son, George, asked me "What are you afraid of?"  Interesting question.  He told me he was afraid of snakes, spiders, ghosts, bears and some others things that 11 year olds typically think about.  Me?  Well, as a martial artist, I am taught not to be afraid of, well, ANYTHING, right?

Our training helps us experience and cope with stress, unexpectedness, pain, fatigue, and other contributors to fear.  We develop confidence, which can alleviate fear of meeting new people, fear of not being accepted and having self-doubt.  We also learn goal-setting and achievement, which helps us in managing some of the intangible fears such as a fear of failure or fear of the future.  As teachers, we learn how to deliver good classes, which overcomes our fear of speaking in public and of leading others.  We deal with fear all the time and using the dojo as our laboratory we can constantly polish our responses.

Study of human conflict reveals that most of it come from fear on the part of aggressors which leads to violence.  Surprisingly, it is most often the attacker who is the MOST AFRAID.  Inability to cope with fear and stress triggers an uncontrollable emotional response that often results in violence toward others or toward oneself.  The kind of training we get in the dojo helps us manage our stress and fear and overcome the desire to react in violent ways in our daily lives.  

I became a martial artist partly because I needed to explore my fear of death, the fact of which led me away from Christianity to seek something personally more useful.  The zen teachings of early sword masters promised tranquility and the ability to transcend these fears (I firstly read "Hagakure" by Yamamoto Tsunetomo as a starting source material).

Overall, our martial arts experience is not designed to help us live a life without fear, but rather to live a life without ever being held hostage by fear.  We recognize fear/stress exist and always will, and apply our training to help us cope with it and do what we need to do regardless of the presence of fear.  This is expressed in zen as "manifesting right action in the right moment."

Sometimes people ask me if I have ever used my martial arts training.  I always answer "I use it EVERY SINGLE DAY".  Then they usually say, "no, but I mean REALLY  use it?" With all seriousness, what other real use could martial arts have except overcoming fear and freeing us to live the life we want to live??

Because of my training, I have been able to have the life I wanted to have.  I have beaten the odds against me every step of the way and continue to do so.  I have not been afraid to challenge my limits and exceed them.  I have not been afraid to engage people and learn from them.  I have not been afraid to explore new territory outside my comfort zones and develop the new skills and knowledge required to adapt my career as needed.  I have not been afraid to commit myself to having the kinds of loving relationships that would sustain me throughout my life.  I have not been afraid to forgive those who wronged me so I can let go and move on without emotional baggage.  I have not been afraid to accept the reality of WHAT IS, nor to embrace the possibility of WHAT CAN BE.

At the end of it all, I am afraid of something bad happening to my family, close friends, or my dogs - that they would get sick or be injured.  I don't particularly have any fear of dying myself and I think I have had a good life already.  I don't wish for death, but instead I feel well satisfied in my accomplishments so far.  If I died today, there would not be much left unsaid or undone in my life.  If I don't, there will be plenty to do to keep me busy.  I vow not to be so afraid of dying that I become afraid of living.  The ultimate goal of martial arts is to have as full and rich a life experience as is humanly possible.  This requires overcoming fear.

I'm afraid not?  No, I 'M NOT AFRAID.

    

Once I thought I was wrong, but I was Mistaken

"There are no mistakes. There are only happy accidents" - Bob Ross

It's tough to be alive in this modern day and age.  The pressure is enormous.
From the time we are barely able to stand, we are measured.  We are taught that there is only ever a single right answer, and that we can never make mistakes.  Everything we do has a number or a grade or percentile associated with it.  In school everything is graded; at work everything is measured with "key performance indicators".  Any little mistake involves reams of paperwork, re-training, lectures, complaining and on and on and on.  Fear of making a mistake is a major cause of workplace anxiety.

I submit that the very best lessons I have learned in my life have not been from my successes but from my mistakes.  It can be argued that the severity of the repercussions for even little things I did wrong has led to a "punishment-avoidance" mentality that yielded performance improvements.  However, I think I have learned a lot even from mistakes nobody knew about except me.

The only way to achieve success in life is to take some controlled amounts of risk.  That always involves a chance of mistakes.  In fact, they are highly likely.  Fear of mistakes will mean fear of exploring the boundaries of our capabilities and limit us to the most boring kind of existence we can have - doomed to complacency and apathy.

This is another reason why I love martial arts.  Proper training with proper teachers allows us to push the boundaries with very little actual risk to ourselves (mentally/emotionally or physically).  We learn to cope with stress, we learn to be goal setters and goal achievers, and we learn and build our confidence in ourselves.

Guro Fred regularly puts us in situations where our first choice of techniques doesn't work - we have to be confident enough to keep moving/adapt/overcome -> FLOW and this is the essence of Kali Majapahit.  In a real fight things almost never go as expected.  These could be called "mistakes" or "accidents" or "fog of war" or a variety of other names.  Whether or not these are "happy accidents" or not depends on your training and your frame of mind.

I encourage you all to train hard and regularly, and to find your FLOW not just on the mats, but in every other aspect of your daily lives.  Accept yourself for who you really are, mistakes and all, and keep walking on the path to self-improvement, even an inch at a time.  be confident in your ability to be resilient and to rebound from every setback.  Be proud of never giving up on yourself.  celebrate your life and the adventures that make it worth living.  Let go of the numbers and be ready to live in the moment for just and only what it is - without measurement or judgement.  Laugh about the "happy accidents" and keep on FLOWING.

"I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." - Michael Jordan

Reflections on my black belt test

so this is it.  I passed my kadua guro 1st dan black belt instructor test in Kali Majapahit today.

It was a six hour test covering single/double sticks, knife vs empty hand and knife vs knife, kadena de mano (empty hands), single/double karambit, boxing and panantukan (Filipino kickboxing).  It ended with working techniques on 20 people in sequence using either empty hands or foam stick.  I'm exhausted.

There is much work to do from now, but I am comfortable with my result.  I have to improve on many, many things, but the test was an accurate reflection of where my skills are at this moment.

As a kalista, I am a product of two sources: my teachers and my students.  I am where I am, reaching this great achievement, thanks to you.

To my teachers, thank you for your patience and for believing in me.  We never know who will walk through our door on any given day, or what lies behind the next door we will walk through.  When I walked through that door on Yan Kit Road in Singapore, I knew my life was going to change forever; to take off in a new and exciting direction.  I knew I had found a driving force that would lead me to become better at everything in my life.  A million light bulbs turning on all at once.

Guro Fred, you reminded me how rich my life could be as a martial artist, and how the positive  energy could be such a source of power in every aspect of my life.  You have continued to inspire me with your drive and vision, and your remarkable way to get people to see the Truth of things.
Thank you for allowing me to set up and run our group as a kasama - thank you for never letting go.

Guro Lila, you have a smile that is pure sunshine, but your heart is a Mighty Dragon. Your own journey has taught me so much about how to live my journey, and your unwavering and relentless pursuit of perfection is the model I aspire to.  I am grateful for your kindness and for all you have shared with me.

Guro Ben, I am so glad you could be my partner for the test.  You are an amazing martial artist and athlete, as well as a savvy and creative businessman.  I hope I can raise my game the way you have raised yours.  Thank you for investing so much in me.

My other teachers, Guro Guillaume, Guro Robin, Guro Frederic, Guro David, Guro Seb, Guro Claes --- you have all taught me more than you know.  Each of you express our art uniquely and each of you have given me deeper perspective on how I need to be in order to be worthy enough to count myself among you.  I look forward to a very long journey together.

For my students, I am so proud of each and every one of you for your commitment to me and your commitment to Kali Majapahit.  In my darkest hours, our class was the only thing I had to look forward to.  You continue to challenge me to give my very best in every class - everything I know, so that you can do and be more.  You are great people and I could not wish for a better Kali Family.  My Fridays are always my best days thanks to you.

A black belt is not an end - it is the beginning of something new.  I am thrilled and excited to set forth on my next stage, and looking forward to sharing this path with you all. Thank you again for your constant support.

The passion of compassion

Everything in martial arts begins with compassion.  It is the compassion of our parents that brings us into this world; the compassion of our friends that nurtures us; the compassion of our partner that sustains us; the compassion of our family that comforts us.  In martial arts it is the compassion of our teachers that train us; the compassion of our brothers and sisters to polish us.  It is our manifest destiny to exhibit this compassion to others, thus creating a positive spiral that makes our world a better place.

People who think of martial arts as simply "punching and kicking" are those shallow people who think of Christianity as simply "wafers and wine".  The essence of what we do; what we must do - must always start with compassion.

Proper martial arts training yields a few keys of understanding:  First of all, we must come to understand the inherent frailty and weakness of the human body.  Every technique we learn and train is designed to illustrate the weakness of our opponent(s).  We attack not just their vital points, but also their structure, taking away their balance and position - and ultimately their strength and their ability to resist.  This practice should make it very clear that we are frail creatures and easily broken. Our further studies in health, wellness, fitness/conditioning educate us in how important it is to control the body in order to prevent disease and injury, which can occur in us all too easily.  Because we decay, maintenance of our physical selves is a full-time occupation.  The result is a higher awareness of humans as precious and delicate, and that all living beings are worthy of our protection and needful of our vigilance.

However, our training also reveals the unlimited power of our minds and the indomitable spirit of our will. We humans are endowed with a miraculous ability to transcend our physical limitations and overcome the dimensions of our existence to become more.  Unlike other creatures, we can go beyond habit and instinct to do more than just "be" (sadly sometimes, to also do less than just "be") .  We alone have the capability to achieve spiritual awareness and keep the connection to our immortal souls.  We alone have the ability to be spiritually connected to our surroundings and through meditation to achieve an enhanced awareness of our place in the universe and to experience "oneness".

Martial arts training is about goal setting and goal achievement.  It is about taking responsibility for our life choices and controlling our own future.  It is about being able to become a better human being not through luck, but through leveraging our experiences and our training to deliberately be more than we were.  It is about finding, establishing and maintaining our connection to each other and to the "oneness" that is central to our being.  Thus, it is natural that we should continue to marvel in the wonder of what it is to be human and to experience compassion as the starting point of our journey.

"We are not a drop in the ocean, we are the entire ocean in a drop".

Keep On Moving

You may be high
You may be low
You may be rich, child
You may be poor
But when the lord gets ready
You gotta move --- Rolling Stones


I am just back from a three-day intensive workshop at Kali Majapahit HQ in Singapore, the inaugural Level 1 Instructor Training Academy.  This had more than 40 martial artists from all over the world gathered to understand the unique blend of FMA, health/wellness, and personal development/philosophy that is Kali Majapahit.  It was unforgettable.

One thing that Guro Fred explained --- we are meant to move.
Genetically, our closest relatives are chimpanzees and gorillas.  If we observe their diet and habits, we can have remarkable insight into our own health and wellness.  Chimpanzees and gorillas do not suffer from any of the "diseases of excess" that plague the West including heart disease, cancer, obesity and diabetes.  They also do not seem to have depression or commit suicide.

These creatures are basically vegan, meaning that with the exception of small, concentrated amounts of high quality protein (insects), chimpanzees and gorillas subsist on a natural, plant-based diet.  The eat a lot (20-30 bananas per day) and drink plenty of fresh water.  They also MOVE.  Constantly.  This would suggest that the same habits of tending toward natural, organic, whole plant-based foods is healthy for us, and that we are born to M-O-V-E.

In addition to their healthier diet, another reason our recent ancestors outlived us was due to their very active lifestyles.  Sitting behind a desk staring at a computer (and then  going home to watch TV) has really only been part of a mainstream career for the past 30 years or so.  Prior to that most of the population continued to have active lifestyles involving movement and sports.  Farming and most other career choices involved at least some degree of physical labor, and this helped to keep us active throughout our lives.

I think Guro Fred is right in that our bodies are meant to be used well and often.  We were designed to run barefoot, designed to climb and jump and be very active.  In fact, the current trends in health and fitness including Crossfit and Parkour, for example, emphasize practical, functional movement as the goal and core component of their training regimen.

We were not made to wake up to TV, watch our smartphone as we sit on the train during our commute, stare at a monitor all day while we sit at our desk and eat our packaged lunch, only to return home the same way we got here, ending up sprawled on the couch in front of the TV before finally going to bed.  Our bodies were designed to hunt and forage for food constantly.  We are not nearly as well suited to hunting animals as nature's REAL hunters (try eating a rabbit or a chicken whole and uncooked sometime).  Design would suggest that we did this only out of necessity in winter when fruits and vegetables were not easily available.

These are hard realities for us to have to face.  With modern medicine to help us when we get injured, it is possible for a person with the right diet and exercise habits to live past 100 years of age.  Soon it may be possible to live well beyond that.

The evidence is compelling.  What do you think?
We should ensure that we MOVE as much as possible every single day.

See you soon.