The Illusion of Permanence

(thanks for the inspiration GE)

It was a great day.  One of the best really.  The sun was rising on the beach in Hua Hin, Thailand and we were starting a day at the Peaceful Warrior Camp, surrounded by friends and doing what we love.  Later, as I watched the long, slow sunset and listened to the ocean my mind drifted away --- I could live like this.  I felt like I could stay like this forever.

In an instant of course I knew it wouldn't last.  The week would end and I would return to a rainy, chilly spring in Tokyo.  I would return to the chaos of meetings, conference calls, emails, bills.  But for now, I was here in Paradise.  I tried to stay in the NOW as much as I could that week.

The other side was also true.  I had been working 14 hour days for nearly seven months trying to close a multimillion dollar global contract renewal.  I would go to evening Kali class and then back to work until the last train (or later).  Weekends I was too tired to spend time with my family   All I could do was try to sleep.  I started to get chest pains and shortness of breath.  I added another life insurance policy - just in case.  Those long days and nights seemed like they would never end.  But they did.  Finally, we got the deal signed.  To reward myself, I bought a Rolex.  When I look at it, I remember those long, difficult days and it feels like a million years ago.

We tend to suffer from an illusion of permanence.  Good or bad, we think things will stay the same forever.  We become complacent.  Of course, reality always steps in to show us that this is not true.  Nothing is set in stone, and nothing is forever. Good times and bad eventually fade into memory and, after we are gone, fade into history and disappear just as we do.

To me, this understanding is very, very important.  The good times -  a good job, a good relationship, a sunny day, a vacation, dinner with friends, raising curious young children, Christmas Day, fireworks, a trip to Hawaii, the cherry blossoms - all will come and go.  It's important (and necessary) to allow ourselves to rejoice in the joys of the everyday.  At the same time, these are made all the more precious by knowing that they will be gone.  This reminds us to savor them fully, to squeeze every last drop of goodness from them.  It tells us to hug the people we love whenever we can, to pet the dog or cat one more time, to sleep in or to have the extra cup of coffee or a piece of apple pie.  Soon enough it will all be gone.

The bad goes, too.  We can endure almost anything if we see an end to it.  Tough jobs, tough relationships, economic hard times.  All of this can be endured.  It's important to remember that this, too, will pass.  Try to see the bigger picture and the longer term outcomes.  Suffer now to be a champion later.  Challenge yourself to be patient and learn the value of perseverance.  Remind yourself again and again to remain calm and try to see past the current hardship.  Meditate more.

Martial arts training also helps us to appreciate the impermanence of life more fully.  Our discipline and meditation practice can help us remain calm and centered, and keep our emotions from getting the better of us, good or bad.  Understanding how fragile our bodies can be (and how strong our spirit can be) helps us gain perspective about our place in the world.  Study of Chi/Ki renews our awareness in the connection we have to everything arounds us - the Fabric of Life - and helps us not be so afraid of the inevitable return to that Origin which awaits us all.  We are ONE. Unchanged.  But always changing.

Peace.