IBGYBG

IBGYBG --- meaning?  "I'll be gone, you'll be gone."  I first read this expression in a book about the financial crisis, which suggested it was commonly used between sellers and buyers of highly leveraged CDS instruments.  These were highly risky "hot potatoes" and the underlying message was that even though both parties knew they were dangerous they should just get the deal done, book the commissions and sell them onward since anyway, both seller and buyer would probably be working somewhere else by the time the regulators showed up (if ever).  Sadly, many of them did just that, and CDS instruments were a central part of the crisis, nearly collapsing the entire global financial system.

I began to think about this idea more and more.  "I'll be gone, you'll be gone" suggests that we not worry too much about the details and that our mistakes (deliberate or accidental) are someone else's mess to clean up.  It tells us not to assume permanence of anything - our jobs, our relationships, our future...nothing.  Live in the moment and let the chips fall where they may.  #yolo.

On one hand, I absolutely agree with Buddhist principles of non-attachment.  As Master Yoda cleverly advises Annakin Skywalker (even more cleverly since he's a hand-puppet)  "Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose."  Clinging too tightly to anything strangles the life from it.  It is the greatest illusion to ascribe anything permanent to the transient nature of our lives.  Small as we are in the Greatness of Things, we are born and die in hardly the blink of an eye of the Universal Timeline.  To assume otherwise is tantamount to arrogance.  That being said, the ocean is made up of tiny drops, each one important in its own tiny way.  Our lives matter, and we are here to make meaning.

On the other hand, because "I'll be gone, you'll be gone" I feel a deep desire to make every interaction with someone positive and meaningful.  We may never see that person again, but what we say and how we act could leave a lasting impression on them that makes their life better or inspires them.  All of us have the capacity to be catalysts for positive change not just in ourselves but in others as well - even those we might meet only briefly.  We should neither ignore nor waste the opportunity for sharing.

If we are to be remembered at all after we leave this cycle, it must be for what we did as much or more than what we said.  Our moral center, our ethical framework and most importantly our ability to act with empathy and compassion are what define us as human beings (human doings?).  In our lives we must learn how to love --- ourselves and others, in order to ever truly find happiness, and the connections we make enrich and prolong our lives more than any material possession.  The great paradox is that to be strong we must learn to accept our vulnerability, to live fully we must learn to accept our inevitable death.

In my working life I have tried to abide by the rules my earliest mentors instilled in me, "Do Good Work, and never do anything you would be ashamed of."  In this way, no matter the many companies I have left, I have always been able to walk out just as I walked in: head high, confident in myself and my abilities.  I encourage you to do the same.

I'll be gone someday.  So will you.  All that matters is what we do until then.

Make Every Moment Count.