Compromising

 

When I was younger, I saw the world very starkly - black or white, right or wrong, good or evil. I conveniently put things into comfortable boxes, placing subjective judgments on everything and everyone, especially myself. As I got older, however, I began to see the world as a continuum, a series of curves with very few absolutes. In business, I began to learn advanced skills in selling and negotiating. My teachers began to coach me in how to see the perspectives of others and to apply active listening and seek solutions that were mutually beneficial. My martial arts studies explored the place of compassion and empathy in the Warrior Way.

For many things in life, the secret to happiness is compromise. Done is better than perfect. The 80% rule. Higher productivity equates to higher satisfaction. More is better.

However this is not always true. In our relationships, at home and at work, there are many times when we should reject compromise. We should seek absolute integrity from our leaders and partners, holding them to the highest ethical standards and always challenging them to be more about people than just profit. Our partners should genuinely care about our happiness and success.

In martial arts too, it is good to seek the best instructors with the highest commitment to quality and care for their students; teachers who are more committed to students learning than their own ego. Teachers who relentlessly grow and evolve with an unquenchable thirst for knowledge rather than staying anchored to the past. Preserving tradition and history is important, of course, but the focus should always be on helping students grow and improve faster/further.

I’ve been very fortunate to have been surrounded by the very best teachers, students, friends and partners throughout my life. It’s the cornerstone of my success.

Please never settle for less. Halfway might as well be no way. You deserve it all.

See you at class. 

Weathermen and Rainmakers

 

(Thanks for the inspiration PM)

One of my close friends just came back from an industry conference. It was a big, multi-day affair with "experts" flying in from around the world to give keynotes and host breakout sessions, sit on panels and otherwise enlighten everyone with their insights. I've attended countless such events in the past and even presented at a few. They are great places to gather info, network, catch up with old friends and share the excitement of the industry.

However, my friend framed it in a way that made a lot of sense (he's good that way) and I realized his categorization applies much more broadly. After watching dozens of speaker sessions, he concluded that those on stage fell into two categories: Weathermen and Rainmakers.

Weathermen were those who gave "market insights", "trend analysis", "forecasts" or otherwise spoke in industry jargon and buzzwords about topics that were clearly well outside their sphere of control or influence. For example, when a central banker opined about AI calling it "transformative" whilst at the same time not actually doing anything in that space or having any experience in it, we can only see him/her as a weatherman, discussing storm patterns and their implications while simultaneously being unable to do anything about it. These presentations are often very entertaining, with colorful slides, catchy tag lines and visuals with generalized predictions and hypotheses about the future. In lieu of other contents, they present historical analyses and discuss the causes and effects, knowing full well that these past results may yield insights but never actually guarantee any future outcomes. They may even cultivate a specific look or persona, and might have curated a robust presence on social media to substitute for their limited actual skills or knowledge. In the end, they are never more than a part of the scenery and soon to be forgotten. A careful eye can always see through their facade.

On the other hand, Rainmakers present quite differently. Their focus is on what they themselves are driving and achieving, the products they are bringing to market (and specific delivery dates), their product pipelines and investments, their calendars of events. Rather than vaporware, they tend to demo real end user scenarios and present real measurable values. They operate solidly in the realms of what they can control and what they can influence - delivering not only thought leadership but also compelling calls to action for other participants to get involved. They build consensus and help organize work into teams and streams so it can actually get done - finding ways of making the impossible possible. Rather than be satisfied with hypotheses about the future, they are out there shaping and creating it every day. When they are in the room, you can feel their vitality. 

In our own lives too, it is far better to be a rainmaker than a weatherman. We can do this by trying to keep our bias toward what we do as an extension of what we say, and to focus on what we can control or influence rather than just engaging in prolonged discussion of high-level academic topics. We can also continue to develop and hone our basic skills, since these are the building blocks of excellence. Preparing detailed task lists and meticulously executing on them with discipline is key to being a rainmaker. Making a habit of this will usually ensure you stay relevant to the matter in question and deliver results rather than just talk about someone else's.

In martial arts, too, there are plenty of weathermen. They are happy to opine endlessly about ki, or other esoteric topics and discuss advanced techniques, but under careful scrutiny are found to train very little and rarely work on their basics or fundamentals. They are often happy to invest lots of money on uniforms and equipment but less willing to invest in daily practice, which is the cornerstone of mastery. They have trouble developing or maintaining the habits of champions and easily find excuses to miss class or train at home and may only work when someone is watching. Their real progress is slow and their knowledge is shallow, since their actual investment of time and energy is minimal. 

Martial Arts, like Life, is not a spectator sport and the greatest joy we can find is in participation. To be clear, I am not advocating violence or conflict. Instead, I am saying that I believe good, daily, martial arts training is the best way we have to maintain our inner peace. By doing so, we inevitably contribute to outer peace in our families, workplaces, communities and society.

Don't let yourself be a weatherman when you can be a RAINMAKER!

I am forever grateful for the many Rainmakers, past and present, that have continued to challenge me to be my best self and to maintain my training no matter what.  Pugay Po!

See you at class.

Doubling Down

 

Here we are in a brand new cycle. Every three months in Kali Majapahit the curriculum changes. In general, during a cycle we will focus on either:

• Single or Double Sticks
• Empty Hand subsystem or other specialist weapon
• Boxing or Kickboxing

This time we will be working on double sticks. Sometimes I get asked "why double sticks? It's not useful..." Some students feel it is not as practical as single stick, with the logic that they are unlikely to have a pair of sticks handy at a time when they get attacked. Fair point. However, double sticks are worth far more in training than just their direct value in stick fighting self defense.

In modern combat sports, champions such as Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, Joe Lewis and others pioneered the combination of western sports conditioning such as weight training and cardio to enhance their fighting performance. In no case did anyone challenge them by saying that lifting weights had no direct combat application. It was understood that improving the body's core strength, conditioning, flexibility, coordination and speed had overall performance benefits. Even the ancient Greeks knew this. Double sticks can be considered similarly in that although it may be highly unlikely for you to use double sticks in actual self defense situations, the training will improve your overall fighting skills in many other ways.

Double Sticks are training methodologies we use to deepen our coordination and dexterity. The drills work both symmetrically and asymmetrically to challenge us to learn to control our hands precisely across a variety of patterns. The drills of Inayan Escrima which are core to Kali Majapahit are designed to build from a foundation (Cabca) to more advanced drills (Sinawali)  that teach us to move weapons together or independently without interfering with each other. This skill, whether applied with double sticks, double swords, double daggers, or any other set of tools of any length makes it very difficult to defend. Especially for asymmetric movements in odd timing signatures, the defender will be very challenged to successfully block both hands across a full chain of attacks. As well, these drills help develop the ability to simultaneously defend and attack (often using one weapon for each) which is both efficient and highly effective.

Mastering double sticks requires deep focus and concentration to cement the muscle memory needed to execute the movements smoothly and at speed. The focus and concentration sharpened by this training enhances not just our other martial arts skills but also our performance in any other sport or physical activity.

In many traditional arts, dual wielding is not introduced until mid-level black belt rank (3rd dan black belt or higher). For FMA it is an essential skill that is part of even the beginner curriculum. Simple drills make great warm ups and can even be isometric training when done very slowly with heavy tools.

Below are common drills which are used to master double sticks. These can be adapted and/or combined with dynamic footwork and movement to increase difficulty. They can even be done in groups of three people to increase difficulty.

• Cabca 1-8 including ladders, one-hand principle, right/left principle, high/low principle, mirror principle
• Sinawali 2-9 including ladders, one-hand principle, right/left principle, high/low principle, mirror principle
• Sinawali 6 variations including abanico, redondo, dunga, doble doble
• 5 count sumbrada including free flow
• 4 count sumbrada including variations such as punyo strikes
• Hubud Lubud (including punyo sumbrada)

All of the above drills can be done with symmetric tools (such as two identical sticks, blades or nunchaku) as well as asymmetric tools such as espada y daga, stick and tomahawk, karambit and daga, etcetera.

I'm very excited for this cycle and the skills it can help us develop.

See you at class.   

Warming Up

 

Every class starts with a warm up. Why? Why don’t we just grab our sticks and start swinging??

There are several reasons:

Reduce the Risk of Injury

First and foremost, we warm up to get the blood flowing into the extremities and loosen up the muscles and joints. For many students, the day is spent sitting at a desk or in front of a computer. The human body is designed to be in motion. Long periods of inactivity are simply not good for the body. The joints stiffen, blood flow slows and energy levels decrease. At the start of class we want to reverse this and get the body ready to be very active throughout the lesson.

Especially during colder weather, our bodies may automatically concentrate blood flow to the core, further slowing capillary action to the hands and feet, both of which we will need throughout the class. Thus, the warm up must articulate the fingers and toes so they are at full capability for the lesson.

For those of us who are older (I'll be 58 this year), strenuous physical activity without warming up first results in days of soreness and stiffness that could have been avoided with a simple stretch before starting.

Increase Mobility & Flexibility 

In addition to increasing blood flow and preparing our muscles for physical activity, warming up is a good time to work on mobility and flexibility. As we activate the various joints we can work on slowly increasing the range of motion in the joints and lengthening the muscles. This promotes joint health and also prepares us to perform better during the class.

Given the amount of time most of us spend sitting every day, my warm ups are centered around spinal health and mobility. About half of the warming up we do is targeted at the three areas of the back/spine (cervical/thoracic/lumbar) in order to try and offset the damage of sitting and keep the spine relaxed and flexible. Kali is a whole-body movement, so having a very active spine is essential for power generation and mobility.

Studies have shown that the best gains in mobility via stretching occur when the muscles are already warm - this would suggest stretching  at the end of class. This is true, however, the mental aspect of the warm up is also very important.

Prepare the Mind

In our modern society information moves very fast. We are constantly bombarded by messages and data, and our jobs and social networks expect us to be connected 24/7. We are often worrying about yesterday or tomorrow and have trouble to be in the NOW, which our Zen Buddhist training teaches us is the most natural state of being. Not only is this a principal cause of stress and anxiety for most of us, it is very dangerous when we are about to start swinging sticks at each other.

For safety it is very important to leave the outside world outside when we come to class. The goal is to experience the class completely, and to do so without concern for anything else.  This allows us a respite from the rigors of our daily responsibilities - a break when we can feel free - at least for the duration of the class.

Many of my high-performing professional friends engage in extreme exercise such as trail running, marathoning, free diving and the like for exactly this reason. Many also practice meditation, yoga, stoicism and other spiritual disciplines. The overwhelming, constant stress of their fast-paced lifestyles will burn them out if they cannot allow their minds to escape periodically.

In Hagakure, the famous book of advice for young samurai, Yamamoto Tsunetomo writes about training to be completely calm in the midst of a raging battle, a metaphor that would apply to many of us I think.

Breathwork

Guro Fred often worked on our breathing with us. It sounds silly to imagine you need a martial arts class to teach you to BREATHE, but the sad reality is that many of us breathe in a very shallow way and fail to challenge our lungs' capacity. As he would say "the lungs are like a pair of balloons, it's important to stretch them". This not only improves cardiovascular performance (VO2 Max) but also helps to calm and quiet the mind. Breath control is a central element of proper Zazen and a cornerstone of most yogic practices, for example.

During the warm up, I often remind students to work on controlling their breathing and, from time to time,  we do the exercises Guro Fred introduced in order to improve overall lung capacity.

So then, What?

At KM Japan,  our warm up is usually done from top down, starting with the neck (cervical spine), shoulders (activates the thoracic spine by mobilizing the shoulder blades), elbows, wrists/fingers. Wrist warm ups are done using the core 3 locking positions of aikido (ikkajo, nikkajo, sankajo).

We then move on to the hip rotations (lumbar spine) and beach ball rotations. We move to the floor series and are focused on stretching the hip flexors (common source of back pain and headaches) and groin. We do deep lunge stretching to target the hamstrings and calves as well as pigeon pose stretches for the outside of the hips/glutes before returning to additional back stretches and side stretches. We finish by activating the ankles and toes for stability/mobility.

This series takes about 12 minutes to complete and allows students time to ease their minds into the focus for the class. It may be a bit long for a one-hour class but at KM Japan we have the luxury of a two-hour session 2/week so this investment into warming up is sufficient.

In Conclusion

Like many FMA systems, Kali Majapahit uses the triangle as a universal symbology. It can mean many things, but I often use it to symbolize stability and balance. In this case, balance between mind/body/sprit which is important to maximize the benefit of every training session.

Warming up is a great habit to start every day, whether you have Kali class or not (Actually, please train Kali every day too). This will help you face the day relaxed and confident as your best self.

How do YOU warm up?  Let me know.

See you at class...

The Grandmaster

 

Last week, as 2023 drew to a close, I was honored to attend a very special and important award ceremony. During this online event, attended by more than 30 Kali Majapahit black belts from all over the world, my teacher, Punong Guro Fred Evrard, received his 8th degree black belt / Grandmaster rank. This was conferred by Dakilang Jeff Espinous, who has been PG Fred's teacher, mentor and friend for over 30 years since his beginning in FMA. Also in attendance were other senior masters such as Guro Bruno from Tahiti, Guro Claes Johansson, founder of Kali De Mano and more. All have been with Guro Fred and Guro Lila for decades and know every detail of their lifework to establish Kali Majapahit. All agree he is well-deserving of the 8th degree black belt and Grandmaster title. As Dakilang Jeff mentioned, we could easily have hundreds of people attest to Guro Fred's worthiness. 

Guro Fred is still very weak from advanced stage cancer and has been fighting with great courage for nearly two years. Despite this, he is still a beacon of positive energy. A true warrior and an incredible inspiration to us all.

As is customary in KM gatherings, we all took turns making comments to mark the occasion. At the camps we would all be in a circle, usually after an evening workshop by Guro Fred or one of the other masters, and reflecting on what we had learned.

When my turn came, I spoke about how grateful I was for the trust that Guro Fred and Guro Lila placed in me 12 years ago, supporting me to establish Kali Majapahit Japan, the first overseas KM school. Since then, we have graduated 8 black belts (so far) and taught KM to hundreds of students. We continued despite COVID and we expect to keep going no matter what.

I am certain that without KM, I would not be a martial arts instructor today. I had been a martial artist for many years before I met Guro Fred and Guro Lila, and already had three other black belt teacher ranks in Japanese martial arts. However, I wasn't teaching. I didn't feel ready and likely would never have. I loved Yoshinkan Aikido (still do) but not sure I would ever have been allowed to teach it (especially not in Japan).

Kali Majapahit gave me a platform to research and discover who I could become as a martial artist. It also rekindled in me a passion to share my insights on martial arts with others that had begun with this blog back in 2005. I wasn't ready to start up a school back in 2011. I didn't even have a Kasama (assistant instructor) rank back then. Nevertheless, Guro Fred and Guro Lila believed in me. They encouraged me to start a study group so I could keep training. They knew I would follow through. That trust meant everything to me. The rest, as they say, is history.

Kali Majapahit's global family has given me a place to belong, which has been the foundation of what I've been looking for all my life.

I was born small, premature and weak. I was left face down in my crib for so long that my left eye failed to develop and is still legally blind today. My birth parents divorced when I was barely a year old and I was placed into a foster family with a different name. I spent over 15 years in therapy/social work with the State of Illinois.  Growing up I was skinny and nerdy with masking tape holding my thick glasses together, not good looking or fashionable or athletic. I had ADHD and was constantly restless. I couldn't sing, dance or draw (I still can't). I was picked dead last for everything - or not picked at all. I had no particular skills apart from reading. I had very few friends (only other outcasts like me) and was bullied relentlessly every day from elementary school all the way into high school. I never had a girlfriend or attended any school events. I was never included in anything at all. I was ignored; forgotten. I didn't exist outside of the annual yearbook or class photos.

I didn't belong in my foster family. I didn't belong in school. I didn't belong...anywhere.  I felt like I didn't belong in this world at all. In those lonely days I often thought about suicide.

When I joined my first real dojo at 14, I became part of something. As a member of the dojo, people didn't care if I was a foster kid or had a social worker. Nobody cared if we were poor. Nobody judged me for my past. All that mattered was showing up to class, following the instructions and doing my best. For the first time in my life I felt accepted. I've been doing martial arts ever since. I think I always will be.

Guro Fred and Guro Lila's belief in me, aided by the advice of Guro Ben and the other KM instructors,  the guidance of mentors like Dakilang Jeff, Guro Claes, Sifu James, Suro Jason and other masters, and the trust of my students have brought me a life I could never have imagined all those years ago. It's beyond my wildest dreams. Together we are a force of change, a bright and positive light in a world that always feels so close to darkness.

We are Peaceful Warriors --- I am beyond proud to be one of you and to help spread this message of Love, Peace, Compassion and Hope for everyone who needs it - just like I needed it. Saving other people saves ourselves.

So THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to everyone who has been a part of my journey.

Most especially thank you to Fred Evrard, my teacher. I am proud to call you Grandmaster.

To me, a Grandmaster is someone who changes the world. Someone who goes beyond the limits of martial arts mastery to a far deeper spiritual awakening and uses this to be the power of change for others. Grandmaster Fred is the definition of this for me. He continues to inspire me to never settle for anything less than living my very best life every day. I promise to continue to do so.

Maraming Salamat Po, Guro    

Fasting - My Approach

 

After 5 days, I'm now in the process of finishing my fast. I feel great and could continue indefinitely but for this round 5 days is enough. Going into a fast, the fast itself, and coming off the fast are all important stages in the process and should be managed carefully to avoid any health issues. I will describe the process I used below.

Why Fast? Why now?

Fasting is a custom that has existed in some form since the beginning of human civilization. There are proven health benefits to fasting including lowering blood sugar, weight loss, improved digestive health and others. Additionally, there are many spiritual benefits as well. In many religions, fasting is a part of tradition and done at various times throughout the year as a way of demonstrating gratitude and humility to a higher power.  In my case, with the holidays coming up I wanted to reduce my weight and lower my blood sugar in anticipation of some year-end gatherings and events. Many people gain weight over the holidays through parties, drinking and the like. In my case I chose to "pay it up front" by fasting beforehand.

Additionally, recognizing that it has been a difficult and challenging year for me with a lot of struggles in a lot of areas I wanted to release some of the negativity, anger and stress and recover my focus to head into 2024. In many spiritual disciplines, fasting is a precursor to new awakenings and awareness, part of a soul-cleansing process which I could use right about now.

Fasting is a reminder that our relationship with food is like any other relationship. It needs to be observed regularly and reset when it changes from being a healthy relationship to being a toxic relationship. In a healthy relationship, we eat the right foods in the right quantities to give good nutrition and feel happy. We share meals with friends and family and enjoy the time we take together. Meals are not rushed, and we anchor our schedule around them. Meals help us to achieve our overall health goals.

However, when our relationship with foods becomes toxic, we rush through meals, snack constantly, binge on sugar and high-carbohydrate snacks. We eat at irregular times and may eat alone. We are in a hurry due to stress/pressure and do not allow the proper time to digest. We may skip meals or deliberately choose unhealthy foods or drink too much alcohol.

As a recovered type 2 diabetic,  I have gone from very restricted diets, counting my macros and weighing my food, to slowly allowing myself an occasional sweet, to not minding my meals or snacking in-between meals. This happened gradually over several months but I knew I needed to reset. A fast was a perfect way to do so.

It allowed me the chance to look at my food lifestyle and make some changes back to a healthier way of eating and position me to succeed the holiday season socially without digging myself into a deeper hole. Many people find themselves saddened in January and resolving to diet/go to the gym and so on. I intend to weigh less and feel better. Fasting up front was the right approach for me.

Preparing to Fast

Fasting comes in many forms including water fast, dry fast, bone broth fast, intermittent fast, etc. In some cases, detox fasts are combined with colonic cleansing enemas for a more complete effect.  Some are shorter duration/periodic, while others can be used as part of an overall lifestyle approach. In my case, my intent was to do a water-based fast. In this fast, no food is chewed during the fast, but basic essential vitamins and minerals are taken through supplements and fruit/vegetable smoothies/shakes.

Prior to starting the fast, in addition to getting the necessary vitamins and supplements, I recommend ramping down calorie intake and switching from processed to whole foods (preferably vegetables only). Alcohol should be stopped as well as any snacks or treats especially those involving processed white sugar. Meat intake should be reduced or eliminated although mild fish can be taken if necessary. Preparation is best raw, or steamed/grilled and fried foods with coatings are best avoided.

Depending on the duration of the fast I recommend ramping down anywhere from 24-36 hours to get your body (especially digestive tract) prepared for the fast without shock to the system. This will minimize adverse effects such as headaches, constipation, dizziness, etcetera. I did a 24 hour ramp down to prepare for a 5 day water fast, for example. If doing a 10 day or longer fast I would do a 3 day ramp down.

The Fast Itself

My regimen was:

Morning

700g green smoothie of mainly vegetables (carrot, spinach, greens) but some limited fruits (mango, apple orange, kiwi, prune)

protein shake of 24g whey protein powder mixed with non-sweetened oat/almond/soy milk

2 capsules psyllium husk total 1,400 mg

1 multivitamin

Lunch

protein shake of 24g whey protein powder mixed with non-sweetened oat/almond/soy milk

2 capsules psyllium husk total 1,400 mg

Dinner

protein shake of 24g whey protein powder mixed with non-sweetened oat/almond/soy milk

2 capsules psyllium husk total 1,400 mg

I used Nature's Way "Alive" Men's Ultra Potency complete multivitamin, which I take regularly anyway. The psyllium husk is designed to cleanse the colon, and is used commonly in detox fasts even without the colonic cleansing enema. I also used Now brand psyllium husks. Both are available in Japan via Amazon or iHerb.

During the fast, it is advisable to drink no less than 3 liters of water per day. I got a 1L bottle and had one in the morning, afternoon and evening.

Since I was doing this fast in winter, I needed to be sure to stay warm. I allowed myself unsweetened tea or black coffee in addition to water. If I felt weak or dizzy I would have a drinkable cup soup and rest. This was no more than 1-2 per day as needed.

My calculated daily calorie intake including the smoothie and proteins was less than 500K calories per day.

Fasting usually comes in several stages.

Stage 1 - day 1 to day 3 - shutdown

During this stage the body is still expecting food to arrive. The stomach rumbles and we can feel very hungry. Emotional stress (hangry) may manifest. Some people may experience serious loss of energy. Weight loss can be significant and often due to loss of water weight.

Stage 2 - days 4-5 - detoxing starts

During this phase, the body begins to detox and you may experience headaches, bad breath, sweats, acne or other skin rashes as your body adjusts to no food intake and starts cleaning. During this phase you may have extremely vivid dreams and interrupted sleep. It may be hard to concentrate or focus. I personally found this to be the hardest phase. Weight loss continues, often due to cleansing of the colon.

Stage 3 - plateau - days 5-7

During this phase some of the physical symptoms disappear, but mentally it can be challenging as we may experience boredom and listlessness. Weight loss tapers off here so the visible effects of fasting are minimized, which may cause a loss of motivation.

Stage 4 - perpetuity - day 7 plus

At this stage, we achieve acceptance and can begin to see the fasting as something we could continue if desired. Hunger pangs are gone, the body is cleansed and focus is sharpened. You may need much less sleep (I needed only 5 hours per night) to feel refreshed. Emotionally, we feel refreshed and lightened.

During my first fast in Thailand, I met an Italian lady who was on day 41 of her fast. She was lean, strong from daily yoga practice, focused and intense. Completely present in the moment. Her blue eyes were like bright shining stars and her smile lit up the room. This was the kind of person I wanted to be.

Coming off the Fast

It has been said that "any idiot can fast. Just stop eating". This is true. However, especially during a fast longer than 36 hours or so, your body will change. Coming off the fast safely requires addressing those changes.

During the fast, your digestive tract bacteria will die. These are very important for gut health and help break down food so we can digest it. These can be replaced by probiotic yogurts or even through a colonic insertion which replaces healthy bacteria directly back into the large intestine. I recommend probiotic yogurts daily for the first 2-3 days.

Eating while coming off the fast should be done similarly to ramping down. That is, whole natural (preferably raw) vegetables and fruits. It's best to avoid processed foods, fried foods, heavy carbohydrate foods, sweets or alcohol for at least the first few days. In addition, very spicy or acidic foods are not recommended until the body is readjusted.

Some recommendations include soups, porridges, salads and smoothies. In general, garlic/ginger, turmeric, cinnamon, mineral salts, cayenne pepper (in moderation) are good for breaking fasts. I personally like raw carrots and bananas. 

Failing to follow safe dietary guidelines will likely result in headaches, constipation and bloating. If so, laxatives may be needed to return the digestive function to a normal cycle.

Some Guidelines

For my fast, I kept the following guidelines:

Increase sleep - allow at least 10 hours/day to sleep and rest

Keep Active - aim for 10k steps per day. No hard exercise though (weights, running, cycling, swimming)

Weigh daily - track every KPI you can including weight, BMI, sleep time/quality, etc. If possible, take blood test before and after the fast

Allow for cold weather -  dress warmer to keep body heat and warm using black coffee, tea, hot water

Keep a Daily Journal or blog- this can help record your thoughts and feelings (and data) for later review

Experience the Journey

My first detox fast was at Spa Samui in Thailand nearly 25 years ago. It was a very emotional 10-day experience including full fast with 3/day colonic enemas to cleanse the colon. I lost 10kg in 10 days and felt reborn. Some months later, I met my wife. That year we were married.

While fasting, try to avoid thinking forward (what you will eat when the fast is over) or backward (coulda/woulda/shoulda) and keep your focus on the here and now. Allow yourself to experience the discomfort and understand that you will endure/survive it. Use this little suffering to find solidarity with the suffering of everyone everywhere and reconnect to your heart of compassion and gratitude. We are all so very blessed and lucky, and fasting is a great reminder of this. Some people fast because they simply don't have enough to eat. Sharing a little bit of what much of the world is forced to experience builds our empathy - an essential attribute for any peaceful warrior.

In Closing

Fasting is a great way to reset the mind and body and to prepare yourself for deeper spiritual insight. It can even help you find answers to personal problems you have been facing. Whether you fast weekly or only once or twice a year, regardless of duration a fast can be a useful tool for overall health.

The above is NOT medical advice and I am not a medical professional. It is the result of 5 experiences of fasting I have done, with varied results, over the past 23 years and is for reference only. Before trying a fast be sure to consult a medical professional and monitor your health regularly. Stop your fast and seek medical attention if you feel at risk.

Bon Appetit and Happy Holidays!

 

How to Train in KM - the value of the subsystems

 

(Thanks for the inspiration SC)

When I started training in Kali Majapahit back in 2008 we were in a beaten up (nostalgic?) shophouse on Yan Kit Road in Singapore, a ragtag bunch of diverse men and women hungry for all the knowledge that Guro Fred Evrard and Guro Lila Evrard (the founders) had brought together during their respective lives in the martial arts. They had just completed a 4-year journey around the world (yes, I'm jealous) and trained deeply with so many legendary masters, enhancing their already decades of experience. Somehow they settled briefly in Singapore and established the first KM school. The result of their years of research is Kali Majapahit, a comprehensive, truly multi-cultural Southeast Asian Martial Art. Since then, KM has grown to 18 locations in 9 countries all over the world.

Kali Majapahit is (I think) unique in that it is named after the Majapahit Empire,  which spanned almost all of Southeast Asia for several hundred years and involved cultural sharing and trading across what became China, The Philippines, Indonesia, Thailand, Cambodia and beyond. Thus, our system is not just FMA, it encompasses techniques from all over Asia. Other FMA styles are organized into subsystems for ease of understanding, but ours is based on subsystems which are culturally very different, and require a broad understanding to apply correctly.

On one hand, this is daunting, especially for new students, since Kali Majapahit can be a bit hard to define or classify. Our various subsystems express very differently and this can be a bit confusing at first. At the same time, the synthesis of understanding across our subsystems allows students to experience much, much more than they every could in any other single martial art (in my opinion).

Our subsystems include Filipino Kali, Indonesian Silat, Southern Chinese Hakka Kuntao, Muay Thai/Muay Boran, JKD and Western boxing/wrestling. In many schools (especially mine in Tokyo, Japan) we also have expertise in traditional Japanese martial arts like Aikido, Judo, Jujitsu and Kenjutsu and these elements are blended into our flow.

The result is diverse and rich, with depth and scope (just like our instructors and students!). There is a lot to discover and the content never becomes boring. In Tokyo, our classes are two hours long, during which we get to explore and practice at least three subsystems each time.

It is important to note than in each subsystem there are many elements which are common, particularly those which involve our body mechanics, since the goal of generating power, keeping balance, remaining mobile apply to every fighting situation. However, the theories and philosophies of HOW to do that differ significantly between subsystems. This requires students to understand the body more deeply, and learn to use their bodies in multiple ways to create the desired outcomes. When we move in Silat, the footwork and physical attitude is very different from that of Western boxing or Muay Thai, just as Hakka Kuntao movement differs completely from that of aikido. No one way of moving is empirically better than another - they are all useful lenses to view ourselves in three-dimensional space. Rather than just having different techniques, each subsystem is designed to allow the student to explore a completely different way of moving - from the footwork upward. This requires fundamentally changing the way we think and act whenever we switch.

Guro Fred often talked about the attitude or "look" that we were to aspire to. When doing each subsystem, we were expected to look like a dedicated professional of that style. When boxing we should look and move like a pro boxer. When doing Muay Thai like a pro fighter. When doing Hakka Kuntao, like a practitioner dedicated to only that. Of course, Guro Fred could always easily show us what that meant and when he moves it's like watching a team of experts at once!

This training gives tremendous flexibility and optionality. The ability to flow from subsystem to subsystem smoothly creates a significant challenge to any opponent we face, since instead of just fighting one person, they then feel like they are fighting five (or more). Every time they think they understand or could anticipate how we move we switch, shifting from one subsystem to another as opportunities present themselves.

Thinking about this reminded me of the legendary Sega videogame VirtuaFighter, which has a character called Dural (left in the picture at the top). Dural's skill is the ability to instantly transform into any VF character and use their moves and abilities. This is extremely challenging to defeat, which is also why Dural is the Final Boss.

Likewise, a mastery of the various KM subsystems is worthy of your time and investment if you also want to BE A BOSS!

See you at class 

 

 

Fifty Seven

 

Well, here we are. Another trip around the sun and now arrived at 57.

Overall, the year has been volatile, with a lot of highs and lows, especially for someone at this stage of life. I always expect things to "calm down" and somehow they never really do. The world seems to careen from one crisis to the next and the news remains depressing and hopeless. I can feel the seething rage under the surface of so many people. I guess I hoped that after COVID we'd learn to love each other more. Being an idealist is a tough and thankless job.

On the plus side, I had several meaningful trips this year including Hanoi (solo), New Orleans (with George) and Bali (with Ray). Each trip was really good and travelling with my boys is something I always dreamed about. It feels wonderful to share these experiences with them. On every trip, I managed to get in in a cooking class or two, and these have been so enjoyable that I now want to take a cooking class every time I travel. The results continue to pay dividends through noticeable improvements in my skills/confidence for Vietnamese, Cajun/Creole and the basics of Balinese cooking. I love replicating the dishes at home and building on what I learned. My health remains stable after my bout with T2 Diabetes. I'm making more time for the gym and consistently able to be at Kali class 2/week and that helps. 

My mental health has been mostly good, with the exception of a few high stress moments throughout the year now stabilizing into a rhythm that I feel I can keep. Each of these stresses has led to deeper realization about what is important to me, and learning to let go of that which is not (definitely easier said than done).

This year has also involved a lot of loss. Iconic actor Sylvester Stallone said in his bio on Netflix "Sly", "All your life you keep adding things. And then at some point things just start getting subtracted." Throughout the year, I have keenly felt the slow subtraction, as everything I have collected in my personal and professional life starts to go away bit by bit. My career trajectory slows, friends and loved ones move away/pass away and overall it just feels like more is going out than is coming in. The near loss of some very close friends to cancer causes me to hate cancer even more than I ever did (which was A LOT). FUCK CANCER.

I'm glad that what remains is (usually) what was most important, and the process ends up being (mostly) the stripping away of the superficial to reveal the truth within. The truth about myself, my environment, my choices and those of the people around me. I have (and spend) less time on bullshit and feel more focused on what matters to me. I don't have many regrets in my life and there is not much I would choose to do differently even if given the chance. However, the recent sudden loss of my beloved pug XieXie at 13 years old is still painful and maybe always will be. She showed me so much and inspired me to learn to love unconditionally like she did. I still have a long way to go and healing takes time.

Illinois Children's Home and Aid Society on Dearborn Street in Chicago, where I got put in transition to foster care back in 1967, feels a long way from Yokohama, Japan where I am now. I've been fortunate to have had a wonderful adventure, with all the ups and downs it has included, and I am overflowing with gratitude.

Hopefully, I'll have a few more posts like these before my time comes. When it does, I want to pass like XieXie did: at home, surrounded by my loved ones, wanting for nothing, knowing that my life meant something, feeling like I did my best.

Until then, thank you for sticking with me.  See you on the mats.

Love and Peace.

Gaining Experience

 

(thanks for the inspiration Kenji)

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted" --- Randy Pausch

"If you could go back in time, what would you have done differently?"

The question hit me hard. I thought about it for a long, long time. I've done so many bad things, hurt people, made so many mistakes, failed so many times... In every category of my life I've seen, felt and done so many things I wish I hadn't. I've cried every flavor of tears ranging from happiness and joy to anger, rage, loneliness and grief... and everything in between.

What if I had the chance to do it all over again or to erase some of my countless errors? Wouldn't I have to take it? What would I have done differently??

Actually, nothing.

I never think of myself as a remarkable person. I am average in just about any way I can think of. Physically, mentally, economically. Nothing special. At least nothing more special than anyone else. If I have had any advantage, it is having emotional resilience. Because of my childhood in foster care and the Illinois Children and Family Services system, I saw and experienced a lot for a young boy. I endured years of therapy and counseling and struggled most of my life (even now) with low self-confidence and a poor self-image. It has taken me decades to overcome (mostly) my abandonment issues and deal with the anger and rage I felt toward my biological parents for giving me up - despite knowing it saved my life before I was even a year old.

Again and again I have been broken. Broken physically, mentally, emotionally so many times as life seemingly dealt me every bad card in the deck. Until it didn't. Did Life change or did I change? After struggling so hard from birth into my mid-twenties, my dreams (finally) began to come true, starting with going to community college and, ultimately, making my way to Japan which had been my dream and focus for over ten years. I nearly gave up so many times, including having my first three attempts to get to Japan end in failure. I tried to take my life more than once, and I am grateful I didn't succeed.

In the end, a lifetime of hardship and struggle made me resilient and independent. I have learned so much...

• I learned that I can choose to show up for myself and be active in seeking my own success and happiness each day. 
• I learned that, with effort, I can let go of my pain, sadness and fear and allow myself to experience joy and believe that I deserve a happy life despite my past. 
• I learned that I can forgive and be forgiven, even when I thought it would be impossible. 
• I learned that life is not set in stone. Far from it. While I am alive, there is always something I can do.
• I learned that even though I came from a broken family, a broken family need not come from me.
• I learned the true, irreplaceable value of friendship.
• I learned that nothing, good or bad, lasts forever.
• I learned that the sun will still rise and the Earth will still spin, no matter what befalls me. I am just not that important. None of us are.

Could I have learned those things without all the good and bad experiences I have had? Could I have found them out any other way? I don't think so. I am exactly who I am, flaws and all, because of all the scars. As per The Butterfly Effect, any changes I would have made would have led me to somewhere else, and I accept where (and who) I am now. I don't need any more and would not want to risk having any less.

I have not had an easy life, and I don't think it has gotten easier. I just exchanged one set of problems for a bigger and more complicated set. I know more people, but have the same small amount of close friends. My day-to-day is narrow and focused and becoming more so as time goes by. I am so much clearer now about what (and who) I want in my life and what (and who) I don't. I am aggressive in pruning away what I don't want.

I desperately want to believe the world is better with me in it, and will be better when I leave it. I put most of my time and energy into trying to prove that. I am keenly aware of my own mortality.

Unfortunately, the only real way to get experience is to get out and do things. Challenge yourself and be prepared to accept the consequences. In every case, I have found a way forward even if it wasn't what I thought it would (or should) be.

In the end, I'm truly, deeply sorry for all the people I've hurt and disappointed along the way. I hope in time they will be able to forgive me. At the same time, I am profoundly grateful for it all. Even the worst things in my life have taught me something important. In many cases I learned more from what went wrong than I ever did from what went right.

What's most important is just to keep going, no matter what. Pauses are OK but don't stop. Make sure you complete the course. The experience will be worth it. I promise.

See you at class.      

The Power of Healing

Recently I read an account of famed social anthropologist Margaret Mead given by physician and author Ira Byock. Mead was asked what she considered to be the first signs of civilization in a culture. Her answer intrigued me. She said that the first sign of civilization in a culture was a femur (thighbone) that had been broken and healed. She further explained that in the animal kingdom, a broken thighbone invariably means death. You cannot hunt or forage or keep up with the others and so you die. Being unable to fend for yourself, no animal, even in a pack, survives long enough to heal from such an injury. A broken femur that has healed is the sign of a civilization that has cared enough for an injured member to feed and support him/her until he/she recovers. It shows caring and compassion. To Mead this was the essence of social structure - caring for each other. 

I would go even further and suggest that healing is not just about caring for others' physical injuries, but for their mental and emotional traumas as well, which can often be just as debilitating. In the martial arts world, too, we see both extremes. Modern martial arts these days seem to promote "practical and tactical" quasi-militaristic models to prepare their participants for the MMA cage or "urban warfare". Many of them tout their military origins, wearing BDUs and adding firearms and other lethal training methods into their tactical response programs. They often appeal to the fear of their student base by portraying a violent, post-apocalyptic world where each daily commute or trip to the supermarket is a potential fight for survival. Many systems are now incorporating sports science, nutrition and peak performance coaching in their programs in an effort to achieve greater outcomes. To me, none of this is inherently bad. The Martial Arts is a continuum of "Martial" and "Arts" with many points along the curve for each person to choose what best suits him/her.

That being said, I think every instructor has an inherent moral obligation to teach their students to behave in an ethical manner. We should emphasize the importance of right action in the right moment as a means of protecting ourselves and others, as well as recognizing our responsibility to be compassionate and caring to as many others as we possibly can. For example,in the original movie "The Karate Kid", the antagonist Cobra Kai have the motto of "Strike First. Strike Hard. No Mercy", which is used as an example of an aggressive mentality that equates modern social situations with battlefield combat. While looking cool to the impressionable young boys, ultimately many of them discover that the Cobra Kai's moral framework is inappropriate in suburban Southern California. 

In contrast, the movie presents Miyagi-do karate as having "respect for all life" and we see recurring examples of Mr. Miyagi's compassion, even to his supposed "enemies". We viewers clearly understand the moral high ground by the end of the film, and like in most cinema, the better man wins and is rewarded for developing good character as modeled by his teacher. It is interesting to note that both instructors, John Kreese and Mr. Miyagi, were decorated war veterans - Mr. Miyagi receiving the medal of honor in WW2 and John Kreese earning a field commission in special forces in Vietnam. What is clear is that both men, both martial arts masters, had very different philosophies based on their upbringings and wartime experiences.

It is often the case that we are stopped from action by fear. We feel afraid and so we fail to do what we should to defend ourselves or others. Paralyzed by fear we watch as bad events unfold, despite the fact that we could have prevented or minimized them. As Yamamoto Tsunetomo points out in his book on bushido, Hagakure (hidden leaves), the purpose of "living life as though one is already dead" is to provide us the freedom to fulfill our destiny as warriors - not just in service to one's superiors, but in service to all others. Yamamoto is really cautioning readers to work diligently to let go of fear so they can achieve their own greatness.

I firmly believe that respect and compassion are the foundation stones of all good martial arts training in any serious dojo, and those teachings should be at the heart of what we instructors model in our own behaviors and reinforce in our communities. 

 Healing others heals us.

Response to "Epistemic Viciousness: Taking Martial Arts Seriously"

 

Yesterday I shared the above article, https://chinesemartialstudies.com/2020/08/31/epistemic-viciousness-taking-martial-arts-seriously/, with our broader instructor team and some of them mistakenly thought I wrote it. Of course I'm flattered, but it was not mine. I merely submitted it for discussion since there are numerous interesting themes mentioned. The article itself is a response to an editorial piece from the South China Morning Post (SCMP), cited here (paywalled, sadly).

I will do my best to respond to the points raised, and I hope you will share your views in the comments as well. As martial artists, we should never shy away from discussing the issues that involve our training and teaching, in the hopes that we can be better informed and deliver more for ourselves and our students.

The "Value" of Traditional Martial Arts Practice

The original editorial article laments the seeming ineffectiveness of traditional Chinese martial arts in favor of more modern expressions such as MMA and Krav Maga, mentioning that the traditional approach does not allow for independent thought or scientific method by the students - instead requiring a cult-like acceptance of anything the Master says as being true and unquestionable.  Compared to modern arts, in traditional dojos there is a decidedly militaristic quality in traditional practice, with lots of ritual and formality coupled with rigorous discipline and respect for authority, especially for instructor ranks. By contrast, modern combat sports like MMA and Krav Maga (even Judo, BJJ, boxing and Muay Thai) can sometimes feel more like a gym cardio kickboxing workout than a martial arts class.

So if traditional martial arts do not easily defeat these modern systems in a fight, what is their value? Are they even worth studying anymore?

As a 40-plus year student and teacher of both traditional and modern styles, I feel both have merit. I would absolutely say that my formative time in traditional Japanese martial arts dojos from age 14 onward was invaluable to help me become who I am today and I see these arts as more necessary than ever, especially for young people. Why?

First of all, I categorically reject combat success as the sole objective of martial arts training. Rather, I would say if your principle goal is to be able to defend yourself/injure others in a fight you are far better off arming yourself with a weapon than studying martial arts. The learning curve for most people to survive a real fight is long and, depending on the encounter, chances of success are limited even then. This is without even addressing the idea that modern combat sports are just that - sports. Yes, a trained boxer can injure people. So could a trained rugby player. It is a particularly foolish assumption to suggest that victory in combat sports (with rules) equates to successful combat performance - even for Krav Maga (unless you are in the Israeli military) or LEO training. Empirical evidence shows that some proper training does help, but does not even remotely guarantee success in a violent encounter. Additionally, combat sports have a very poor track record in court for those who use them indiscriminately. Without a deep awareness of the law in each jurisdiction, injuring someone in a fight will get you arrested, sued and potentially land you in prison. This is not worth it unless violence is absolutely unavoidable. Furthermore, teaching combat sports to children/young adults requires extreme care, since a lot of moral judgement is required to know when it is OK to use these techniques and when it isn't. Even if a young person might not go to jail for delivering an elbow to a classmate's face on the playground or pitch there are still serious repercussions (including emotional trauma) for doing so without clear justification. 

Discipline and Respect for authority are important skills for becoming a successful adult in modern society. As a person who has spent more than 30 years living in Japan, I can attest that it is useful to understand how to create harmony inside and outside the workplace, and to learn to establish and strengthen relationships both upward and downward (senpai and kohai). My time in the dojo helped me develop universal respect - respect for myself, respect for the other students, respect for the seniors/instructors, respect for the traditions/history of the art. This was never done out of fear, guilt or negativity, but rather by encouraging a sense of belonging as part of an organized hierarchy - something the 14-year old me was desperately yearning for. My teacher knew how to motivate me outside the dojo as well. If my grades were low or I got in trouble, or if my foster parents complained he would simply not allow me to train for a while. That was enough to get my total compliance. My behavior and grades improved dramatically and, during a time when most teens are rebellious, I was able to maintain healthy relationships with my parents and others. I think it is also worth noting that modern combat sports often emphasize the individual player over the group. Matches are 1:1 and sparring is central to the training. In traditional schools, the organization and hierarchy are very important. In a very traditional dojo, a member is not even mentioned in the dojo record until they are instructor level. One's place in the social fabric must be earned through training and interaction, not just by fighting skill. 

I spent my first 7 years training in ninjutsu, including both taijutsu and kobudo, eventually becoming familiar with all the weapons we used. Weapons training as well, increases focus/awareness and develops respect for the inherent danger to yourself and your training partners. After my initial 7 years, my teacher sent me to another master for specific work on kenjutsu/Iaijutsu, as I requested. This involved long hours of suburi and seiza for conditioning, as well as practice cutting (tameshigiri) with a variety of traditional weapons on his farm in Indiana. In addition, I am sure for every hour on the mats I spent at least another hour or more studying. My teacher's curriculum was based on both pen and sword, meaning that I was required to study military history (especially Japanese), large and small unit tactics, politics, philosophy/spirituality and more. I was also required to range certify with pistols (automatics and revolvers of multiple calibers) and shotguns (pump-action and semi-auto). I wrestled in high school and fenced in college. By 23, after nearly 10 years of study in traditional dojos, I am certain my killing skills were at their peak and at least the equal of anyone having done combat sports. Fortunately, my teachers instilled in me a very strong moral compass and the responsibility to know that my training was only ever to protect myself or others in times of great danger, not for tournaments or sport.

In the 80s and 90s I enjoyed the study of Aikido very much, including Aikikai, Takeda Ryu Akijujutsu and finally Yoshinkan in the 2000s. As I have written before, I do not consider these to be combat arts per se, but their foundation improved my sword work and every other aspect of my martial arts to this present day.

I fully believe this training, since I was 14-years old, is the reason why I have been successful in my life and overcome every challenge I have faced. I was able to develop discipline, self-confidence, awareness, universal respect and self-control. I became part of a community and developed lifelong relationships which have supported me mentally and emotionally for decades. As an instructor, I have been able to pass this gift to hundreds of other people and try to help them find the courage to become the best versions of themselves. I haven't had to kill anyone yet, and I actually abhor violence. Because I am confident, I do not feel the need to escalate an encounter or fight due to fear. My martial arts is there if it is needed to defend myself or others, but I have gotten so many benefits apart from fighting that I can safely say it has been the best investment in myself I ever made. I am filled with gratitude and use every opportunity to pay it forward for others.  

My point here is that martial arts is exactly that: Martial and Art. Each person must find the training that matches his/her goals - balancing the martial aspect and the art aspect to deliver the right outcome. As parents, we have to be sure that the instructors we trust are preparing our children to be good quality human beings rather than gladiators. This means learning focus and goal-setting, balance and coordination, respect  (especially self-respect) and discipline, self-control and anger management. A good dojo promotes curiosity and discovery, as well as leadership and initiative. It means fostering a community of positivity and a support network which will help each student have a smoother transition into successful adulthood - becoming the person they truly want to be.

About Kali Majapahit

I began my Kali Majapahit journey in Singapore in 2008. I was fortunate to meet the founders, PG Fred Evrard and Guro Lila Evrard, and have been training with them ever since. Kali Majapahit was intriguing for many reasons. As the name implies, it is a blend of many sub-systems (including Hakka Kuntao, Silat, Kali Sikaran and Inayan Escrima) found throughout the Majapahit empire and is taught within the broader framework of Filipino martial arts. The art is comprehensive and includes all ranges and tools (empty hands, edged weapons, impact weapons, improvised weapons, locks and grappling). After 15 years, I am still learning new things all the time.

The pedagogy is anchored in positivity, seeking a balance between physical, mental/emotional and spiritual development. This ensures that students develop the correct moral and ethical framework as a part of the training. The techniques are taught through patterns, drills and templates, but students are very soon challenged to apply the concepts they are taught through discovery, rather than just mimicking what the instructors do. There is sparring (empty hands, training knife and foam stick), with an emphasis on safety and learning how to respond under pressure.

Kali Majapahit has allowed me to express my full and authentic self as a martial artist without ever limiting me. I draw from over 40 years experience (25 years before starting KM) which enriches what I can discover and share with my own students.

Most importantly, Kali Majapahit was designed to grow and evolve. As PG Fred Evrard has often said, "I wrote the first pages and chapters. It is up to all of you to write the rest". Inherent in this mandate is that we must question all we have been shown or taught. We must learn and research on our own, rather than just accepting what we are told at face value. There is no magic, voodoo or chicken blood. What works in KM works because of the good science behind it - physics/geometry, body mechanics, ergonomics, psychology, philosophy. 

Traditional arts are beautiful and timeless because we can honor the lineage that has handed them down generation after generation. That said, many of them have become watered down and the deepest aspects of their teachings have been lost over time. The techniques have often been made "safer" for training to help avoid injury in class, adding breakfalls and other safeguards to the practice. Moreover, many of them have failed to adapt to the changing requirements of society and become inappropriate for modern times (most of us do not carry a katana during our daily commute). Some of this gives them romantic appeal (Bushido) but at the cost of relevance for modern self-defense. By contrast, the KM curriculum is under constant review, with updates generally happening more than once every year. There is a feedback loop to understand and improve the result of each topic, and many of us in the global KM community are conducting ongoing research to add to the body of knowledge we share.

In Conclusion

In conclusion, I am not explicitly saying Kali Majapahit is the answer to the author's criticisms of traditional martial arts, nor suggesting it is inherently better than other available combat sports.  Taught well, almost any martial art can be effective for any combination of martial and art. However, I am saying that a good dojo will take the best of both traditional and modern elements in order to find an approach which offers the benefits of social structure and organizational hierarchy as well as the evolutionary feedback loop in order to give students of all ages and levels the most comprehensive training experience.                

Choosing a Bokken

 

(thanks for the inspiration Matsu)

It is said that "a master reveals himself in every action." This means that when we observe a master, his/her actions are consistent in every aspect of life. Each daily activity is subject to reflection, observation, consideration and worthy of a constant focus. A true master observes himself/herself constantly, seeking to understand in order to improve. It is the constant scrutiny of an examined life that yields the deepest insight and meaning. The awareness of every moment is the cornerstone of mindfulness.

About 20 years ago, a close friend approached me for advice. She had enrolled in Japan Action Enterprise, Shinichiro "Sonny" Chiba's legendary stunt training school, which produced dozens of stars for live action samurai dramas (called "Chanbara"), superhero shows and other events. As a former gymnast/dancer, she already had the physique and movement skills. She was excited to learn lots of new things, including the sword fighting skills. As a guy known for having trained Iaijutsu/Kenjutsu extensively, she asked me for help in choosing a bokken (wooden sword) for training. I obliged.

Together we went to Suidobashi in Tokyo, a place famous for martial arts gear shops, particularly kobudo and kendo gear. This was the best place to find a suitable bokken. There were many lengths/sizes to choose from. I explained about the types of wood used and the types of training typically done with each variant. In the end, she approached me with one, handed it over and said with a big smile "I like this one." It felt like a pair of chopsticks...thin, flimsy and very. very light. I asked "Why this one? It's so light?" She looked at me as if I was stupid. "I like this one just because it's very light!"

In that moment, I saw that she and I were very different. 

I remembered my initial training in Japanese sword and choosing my first bokken during the summer of 1980 when I was just 14 years old. My teacher took me to the big martial arts supply store in downtown Chicago and made me choose, just as I had made her choose. I brought back a bokken that felt like a tree trunk and weighed like a telephone pole. It was far too heavy for me. My teacher smiled. I thought he might have been quietly proud of me. I chose that one specifically because it was solid and heavy, hoping that swinging it 10,000 times would make me strong. It did. Since then, I always choose the heaviest tool in the box.

As martial artists, it is wrong to seek shortcuts or easy ways out. In the end, we come to the dojo to practice, we join martial arts to train. The harder the training, the stronger the warrior. The more we cry in the dojo, the more we laugh on the battlefield.

Sometimes in class, I see students try to cheat the drills, not going deep enough or pushing hard enough. I see them holding back or keeping their strength in reserve. Sometimes they don't believe in the technique or in their own skills.  As a teacher, I feel it is an important part of my job to get students to appreciate the intensity of the session and face their hardships with a smile. I hope the students will understand that the deeper they go the stronger they will become. I'll support them all the way.

It is the challenges that help us become the best versions of ourselves.

Choose the heaviest bokken. You'll be glad you did.

Kyosaku

 

(thanks for the inspiration Guro David)

Much of Buddhism is misunderstood. Especially when it comes to Zen Buddhism and Esoteric Buddhism, casual observers tend to pick and choose their favorite tidbits and ignore the rest. Often, Buddhism gets reduced to pithy catchphrases in science fiction movies or spouted from white-bearded Chinese kung fu masters. The kyosaku is sometimes attributed to physical abuse of the initiates, as if the teacher is clubbing them with a baseball bat (or threatening to do so). The reality is very different.

Many of us come to Buddhism seeking peace and tranquility, hoping the seated practice will yield a sense of "centeredness". Very soon, we realize that seated practice in Zen is really hard work. Emptying the kind is difficult. Being patient is difficult. My original teacher in Zen Buddhism, at the Japan Cultural Center on Belmont Ave. in Chicago circa 1985, used to say that if properly done Zazen should leave you pouring with sweat. In the Zen world, peace is hard-earned indeed.

While seated, the legs tire, the mind wanders, the posture slumps, fatigue sets in, we lose our connection to the NOW...focus becomes, well...unfocused. The kyosaku is an important tool in the training.

Usually, the kyosaku is employed by the teacher to help sharpen up the students' focus as they sit. When a student feels themselves waning and unable to recover, they bow forward as the teacher approaches. The teacher bows back, and sharply strikes the space between the shoulder and neck with a quick tap from the kyosaku. The sudden shock causes no injury whatsoever, but jolts the student back to focus. The students are asking for help to refocus. They want it. 

In Kali Majapahit, we do not employ the kyosaku nor anything resembling it. That said, sometimes students need a "reset" to refocus for the remainder of the current drill or next activity. Using our words properly, we can shock the students back to the present moment and present engagement.  It is our job as teachers to help the students when they need it so they can remain high energy/high focus. Rather than spikes and dips, we try to keep the engagement and energy level at a consistently high level throughout by changing drills/partners/activities, giving feedback, challenging and gentling bringing each student out of their comfort zone. As Guro Fred often says, at the end of class we want them to be sweaty, smiling and satisfied.

Outside the dojo too, various distractions can occur that can keep us from staying focused on our goals and moving forward. There is a time for rest, of course, but not just because you are unable to stay on task. Each of us have (or should have, anyway) a thing we do to get our focus backup and remain engaged in the activity at hand. I stand up, stretch, and look out the window for a moment. In the worst case, I go take a cold shower to refresh myself. That always works for me.

What's YOUR kyosaku??  

   

The Peg

 

(thanks for the inspiration SC)

Pachinko is one of the strange phenomena which many people associate with Japan. It's a gambling game where you launch a bucket of small steel balls one at a time into a vertical board where they bounce off an array of pegs on their way to the bottom. If they land in certain channels or holes, you score points and redeem more balls which can then later be exchanged for prizes or money. It's loud and has bright flashing lights and the shop has fast techno music blaring - a total sensory overload. Like slot machines, some people are addicted and play them often, some even daily.

While I am no fan of pachinko and no advocate of gambling either, pachinko makes an interesting metaphor for life as a martial arts teacher. Last night after class we were talking on the train ride home and I shared the history of KM Japan, now 12 years old and counting. During that time many students have come, stayed and gone. New students are joining all the time. We have a wonderful, supportive community of people who are positive, supportive and energetic. We're changing our lives, together.

What about those who left? Everyone has a story and a reason. Some left because of their jobs or families. Some left to pursue other dreams or do other martial arts. For the most part, students who have left are always welcome to return if/when the path brings them back to us.

I began to think of my role as that of a peg on a pachinko board. As you can see from the photo, the board is filled with many pegs or pins. When the ball strikes a peg, it will be deflected right or left as it continues its linear journey to its final destination. The peg may encounter the ball for just a split-second, but its trajectory has been altered. Of course, the ball would have traveled very differently had the peg not been there. On the way down, the ball will strike a variety of pegs and have its trajectory changed multiple times before it gets to the bottom. Math people will recognize it as a multiple-step binomial stochastic. The fun (if you consider it fun) of pachinko is the seemingly random path the balls take. However, an expert will tell you the path is not entirely random and that striking certain key pegs helps to determine the odds of landing in a particular desired spot. Each peg has a role to play and is not responsible for anything other than the impact of the ball it must cause. The pegs cannot keep the ball, nor chase after it once it passes by. There is no worry if the ball doesn't strike a peg, since other balls will inevitably follow.

I do not own the journey of my students. They do. It's all I can hope to be a peg in their boards at the right time for them to be redirected by meeting me, hopefully to a better place in the future. I have bounced off of many pegs on my way here, and I am still in motion. Likewise, many steel balls have bounced off me in the past 12 years, and I hope many more will come to me before my time is over.

If I do my job well, I can be a catalyst for change. I can be the peg in the board that changes the direction of the ball toward something better. Combined with all the other influences, I can be a part, even a small part, of that ball reaching a desired destination and achieving success (the metaphorical prize at the bottom).

Like so many things in life, you can't win if you don't play.

See you at class!

   

Save Me

 

(Thanks for the inspiration Dancing J)

Growing up, I knew I would never have the same kind of life as other kids. I was a foster kid from a group home, an ethnically Jewish kid ironically raised by foster parents who were German Lutherans (nee Schultz) and Irish/English Catholics (Leonard) in suburban Chicago. I had a bed, a roof, some clothes on my back and food on the table. It wasn't much but it beat the hell out of being in a group home. I heard from other fosters about the horrors that took place in group homes, and I was (and always will be) grateful to have been spared from it. I was so lucky to have the same foster family for nearly 18 years - the whole program.

My foster parents, Charles and Dorothy, were 40+ years older than me and not prepared to handle a kid born premature, blind in one eye, and with ADHD. Along the way I caused a lot of suffering for them, which I deeply regret, but they never gave up on me, my foster mom didn't, anyway.

For much of my childhood, several times a week I was picked up off the playground in front of everyone and whisked away to Illinois Children's Home and Aid on Dearborn Street downtown to see my caseworker, just as if I had been abducted by aliens. I would be returned that night, looking the same but feeling "different" after having them poke around my head and trying to get me to articulate my "feelings" about having been abandoned into foster care at 1 year old. At school, the other kids treated me badly and I was bullied mercilessly/continuously for being different - for being a little, runny-nosed kid with a big mouth, thick glasses held together with masking tape. They said I was being taken to a secret lab and "experimented" on... not so far from the truth after all. None of my many faceless caseworkers or social workers did me much good. Mostly I just wanted to be left alone.

 

At night I dreamed of being far, far away --- somewhere, ANYWHERE where I wouldn't have to endure the life I was given. I imagined my real parents swooping in to take me back to the better life I thought I deserved. I imagined them loving me and wanting me. I have never stopped imagining it, even to this day. There is nothing more cruel than allowing a child to feel unloved or unwanted.

More than anything, I wanted someone to save me. I wanted to be saved from the heartbreak, the emptiness, the loneliness, the broken promises, the hopelessness. I wanted to be saved from the kids who bullied me. I wanted to be saved from my thoughts, which drifted toward suicide so often. I wanted to be saved from myself before I did something...permanent...in order to escape. No one ever came.

At 14, I started working full-time (Teddy's Hot Dogs) while I kept going to school. I paid my own high school fees and bought my own textbooks. At 18, I completed foster care and Cook County freed me to be my own legal guardian. My foster parents moved across the country to Nevada and I stayed on my own in Chicago, renting a room at a friend's house.

After high school, with no money or prospects to go to college I worked full time, driving a forklift at a warehouse. I was 20 years old making $5.10 an hour but it was honest work. I'd look in the mirror and wonder if this was really all there was. Again, I was hoping someone would save me. I wanted to be saved from the boredom of an average life. I wanted someone to tell me how it was going to get better and when. I wanted a life plan.  Again, no one came. The days passed.

After two hard years I had saved up enough money for a class at community college (College of DuPage). I was pretty sure I'd never get a degree or be able to afford to continue going but it was a start. I sat in the parking lot and cried with joy at Introduction to Psychology (April 1987) which for me was a symbol of my hopes and dreams for my future taking shape. Somehow, I kept scraping together enough money to go and take more classes. Since the classes I wanted/needed were during the day, eventually I had to give up the warehouse and get a night job. I learned to bartend by going to a three-month bartending course over the summer and started working nights and going to community college during the day. With good tips I was able to afford my little apartment, a running car and my classes. The bar had free employee meals which kept me in food and drink (whenever I was working).

Fast forward to today - at 56 I have lived and worked in Japan for well more than half of my life - since I was 24 years old - 32 years and counting. I finished college entirely self-funded and graduated with a 3.54 GPA and a dual BA degree in International Business and Japanese, while working full-time. I went on to get a Masters of Science in Finance degree from Baruch College, CUNY (also self-funded and also while working full-time). I have worked for the very best companies in the world including Canon, Lehman Brothers, JP Morgan, Thomson Reuters, Salesforce, Microsoft, ServiceNow and even worked on both sell-side and buy-side in capital markets. I got married, bought a house and raised a family. I continued my martial arts journey, ultimately becoming a teacher as well as a lifelong student. I have visited more than 50 countries (and counting) and mastered one of the most difficult foreign languages for westerners to learn (Japanese), ultimately becoming a translator/interpreter and editor as well.

All the dreams I achieved in my life (and more) happened because I was saved (no, not by Jesus Christ). 

I was saved by…myself.

After spending so many years waiting for someone else, I very painfully learned that no one was coming. My parents weren't coming to get me. Nobody was coming to show me the way. No job was looking for me to be a senior executive. The Emperor of Japan didn't send me an engraved invitation. The school didn't give me a full academic scholarship. No beautiful, rich heiress came knocking on my door to take me to live in the Caribbean. Nothing. Silence. Emptiness. Just...me.

The day I realized this was probably the worst day of my whole life. The sadness and darkness consumed me. I have never felt more alone, never been more scared. The walls of my little room closed in on me until I was sure I would be crushed. I couldn't sleep and suffered from nearly constant panic attacks and crippling anxiety. I was paralyzed by fear. I didn't even know where to begin. I was sure I would fail.

Likewise, the day I realized this was probably the best and most important day of my whole life. Despite the fear, I was free. I no longer needed to wait for anything or anyone. I knew they weren't coming, so I simply got on with the business of living. I made my plans carefully, step by step, because I knew I had no backup, no plan B if I failed. I came to Japan in 1991 (4th attempt) and left everything behind. There was nothing to go back to if I didn't make it. I took risks, but always when I felt the odds were heavily in my favor. I couldn't afford to lose. Knocked down again and again, I always got up and kept going. I knew there would never be someone to pick me up. I would have to do it myself. Painful as it was, I always managed to keep moving forward, inch by inch. Say what you will about me, I think I am probably the world's most stubborn bastard and that has helped a lot.

I am no saint, no angel. I am no superhero or demigod. I am no Bodhisattva. What I did anyone could do. Many have done far better. My only advantages were being unafraid to work hard, and recognizing early on that I would have to do it myself. This saved me a lot of time. Once I stopped waiting, the days became busier but those inches added up to a life I am grateful for and a set of experiences I treasure. In retrospect, a few things I would advise:

• Do not depend on your family for an inheritance or a life of ease and luxury.
• Do not depend on your teachers to give you all the answers.
• Do not depend on your employer to give you skills or a career or imbue you with wealth.
• Do not depend on the government to give you health or support in your old age.
• Do not depend on society to look after you or defend your rights.
• Do not depend on those around you for your success or support when things get really bad.
• Do not depend on your partner for your self-worth or happiness.

Look deeply into the mirror at your greatest ally, your BFF, your rock of strength. Look at the one who can take you where you want to go. Look and see your savior. Your champion. The one you've been waiting for. YOU.

You got this.